It is startling how 10 months have gone by so quickly. Granted, it was no blink of an eye, but it was much faster than I would have ever thought it could be. As I sit here in a borrowed desk for the last time at the firm, I am feeling reflective, pensive even.
I still recall "finding" this firm through my 关系, my neighbor's cousin's contact, yes, it's actually rather distant, and I was apprehensive the first day. In fact, I had arrived a full 30 minutes early (I start at 9:00, but arrived at 8:30) to the firm. As I twiddled my thumbs in the waiting area, I remember growing more nervous by the moment as to why my boss had yet to show up. He was a good 15 minutes late after 9:00 p.m., so I had sat in the office for 45 minutes, nervous that he had forgotten about my arrival. However, as he hobbled in on crutches from his fall in the snow, somehow deep down inside I had breathed a sigh of relief. I was still nervous granted, but it was a relief to know I hadn't been forgotten. As my poor boss hobbled on crutches down the hallway, introducing me to each and every lawyer in the firm, I knew that he was a sincere person and that my stay here would be a pleasant one.
Now, it all feels a little bittersweet. Of course, I am happy to be leaving the constantly smoke-filled environment, and will enjoy not having to lug my laptop all the way to the firm everyday, but I will miss the people. They are all very sweet. Unfortunately, I guess my own personal timing is a little off, because my last day here, and everyone is either at court or out of town on a case. It feels as if I will leave as quietly as I had come, and perhaps that will make it appropriate. I am apprehensive of Amy's arrival to the firm, namely because no one is here today. The one person who she could've interviewed is off delivering cases, but he is said to return by the afternoon. Who knows? I suppose it's all just nerves. I don't want to come off as insincere, but it's really out of my control. All I guess I can say is I tried, and place the blame on myself. It was me who picked an inopportune time, not her or anyone else. Oh well, 4 months have finally come to an end, and all I can say is that I'm glad it's over. I learned a lot, not from actual work, but more from my interaction with the people at our firm. I observed a lot, asked a lot of questions, and found out things by eavesdropping. Haha. They are a boisterous but warm-hearted bunch. I will miss them for sure.
Tuesday, June 22, 2010
Monday, May 24, 2010
Chinese are like birds...
So in my pensive state this morning on my way to the bus stop, I came up with a good analogy, or perhaps a metaphor of what Chinese should be likened to. Chinese are like birds, particularly crows or ravens. It might sound offensive, but a lot of common behavior have led me to believe that this isn't too far fetched.
Much as birds do, the Chinese leave a trail of shells (sunflower seed ones) behind after consuming them, excrement is bound to follow (no thanks to the 开裆裤). They are loud people, likened much to the familiar squawk that crows give off, whether it is on the street, or barking into their phones. They are attracted to shiny things, gaudy, shiny things just because they assume bigger is better, shinier is pricier, which is a direct reflection of wealth, but as we all should know, this is only a superficial matter. In fact, what is sad is that the crow itself doesn't appreciate its own hidden beauty. It thinks that it is sad, pitiful, and dark because of its "humiliating" past as they themselves describe, but in actuality, they have merely forgotten to see the beautiful sheen that lines within their dark feathers, which gives them depth and hidden grace that is so rare in present society. If they would stop enviously looking at others, one day they might see and once again find pride in the creature it already is.
Much as birds do, the Chinese leave a trail of shells (sunflower seed ones) behind after consuming them, excrement is bound to follow (no thanks to the 开裆裤). They are loud people, likened much to the familiar squawk that crows give off, whether it is on the street, or barking into their phones. They are attracted to shiny things, gaudy, shiny things just because they assume bigger is better, shinier is pricier, which is a direct reflection of wealth, but as we all should know, this is only a superficial matter. In fact, what is sad is that the crow itself doesn't appreciate its own hidden beauty. It thinks that it is sad, pitiful, and dark because of its "humiliating" past as they themselves describe, but in actuality, they have merely forgotten to see the beautiful sheen that lines within their dark feathers, which gives them depth and hidden grace that is so rare in present society. If they would stop enviously looking at others, one day they might see and once again find pride in the creature it already is.
Saturday, May 22, 2010
Over-reacting
It is amazing how a bad night's rest, wacky hormones and an e-mail can cause an overall meltdown, and I apologize for the previous post. I think I definitely over reacted. Having calmed down significantly now, not to say that I'm not still angry or irked, I am no longer a pile of ranging hormones. I am thinking straight.
However, there are 2 things on my mind. On the one hand, now that I am no longer seeing red everywhere, I have figured out a way to work with the system, trying to find a loophole here or two and will hopefully find a way to work it out with the idiotic bureaucracy. On the other hand though, a part of me is itching for a fight. I am tired of always caving into this system and working from within it. I want to fight it, but there might be too much at stake to do so. I simply have too much to lose. However, is it worth it? In my heart, I feel it is a matter of principle, I want to regrow my backbone and stop bending over backwards at their every whim. But practically speaking, reality says that I need to work with them, or I will only bring all the wrath on my head. It is stupid, and perhaps the future students will benefit, but in the short term, I will be the only one to suffer.
I'm still debating between the options, and I think I have to be realistic. However, even with realism, it doesn't mean I have to lose my ideology as well. Perhaps I can be a double agent in this matter and play both sides. If they're going to be sneaky behind my back, why shouldn't I? It's a bureaucratic game after all, is it not? It's only fair that I deal a few more punches before I go.
However, there are 2 things on my mind. On the one hand, now that I am no longer seeing red everywhere, I have figured out a way to work with the system, trying to find a loophole here or two and will hopefully find a way to work it out with the idiotic bureaucracy. On the other hand though, a part of me is itching for a fight. I am tired of always caving into this system and working from within it. I want to fight it, but there might be too much at stake to do so. I simply have too much to lose. However, is it worth it? In my heart, I feel it is a matter of principle, I want to regrow my backbone and stop bending over backwards at their every whim. But practically speaking, reality says that I need to work with them, or I will only bring all the wrath on my head. It is stupid, and perhaps the future students will benefit, but in the short term, I will be the only one to suffer.
I'm still debating between the options, and I think I have to be realistic. However, even with realism, it doesn't mean I have to lose my ideology as well. Perhaps I can be a double agent in this matter and play both sides. If they're going to be sneaky behind my back, why shouldn't I? It's a bureaucratic game after all, is it not? It's only fair that I deal a few more punches before I go.
Thursday, May 20, 2010
Venting
I seem to have a number of limited outlets in venting these days, and I don't think it would be fair to unleash that wrath on just one individual. I think I'm just so completely fed up by a system that is arbitrated by incompetent people. STOP making decisions that you have no idea how they'll affect the people under you. STOP making changes to a program every term, just because you can. There has to be a law that protects me or some rule at the university that prevents this. I am just tired, tired with it and tired with dealing with it.
Perhaps it is a good thing that I'm by myself this weekend, I just feel like bawling to myself and then curling into a fetal position. Honestly, my sanity is being tested here. Right when I thought I had everything in order, everything is pulled out from right under me. I don't know whether to cry or to just scream.
I think lately I've been depressed beyond reason. It's not the nostalgia, but maybe it's just this streak of bad luck. I have no motivation. Every single scholarship application I've applied to this year has ended in rejection. I am not eligible for any positions with stipends at the university. I have no reason to believe I can do well on the LSATs, let alone get accepted by Law school and receive funding while I'm there. I feel like I have wasted an entire year abroad, having learned not a single thing that would contribute to my academic success. Yes, I have come to understand the culture more in China and even the working environment, but I am just so burdened by this load. Maybe I am depressed... and that's why everything seems so downright gray and dismal. Maybe I just need to cry, a good long cry, since I've been holding everything in. It's so downright weak, but maybe after that I'll start thinking like a sane person again.
Oh yeah, one thing I forgot to mention was my recent declining health in lieu with the bad luck. It started out with not being able to sleep, light sensitivity, noise sensitivity, and then dry throat/allergies developing, post-nasal drip starting again, muscle pain, getting food poisoning, and now I think I might have had a minor heart attack. I recall reading somewhere that young people have often had heart attacks without even realizing it. My upper chest cavity all of a sudden had needles in it this afternoon. If voodoo works, this must be what it feels like, because it was like someone was stabbing needles in my chest. It hurt to breathe. While it's subsided now, the pain is still there. What is wrong with me?
Perhaps it is a good thing that I'm by myself this weekend, I just feel like bawling to myself and then curling into a fetal position. Honestly, my sanity is being tested here. Right when I thought I had everything in order, everything is pulled out from right under me. I don't know whether to cry or to just scream.
I think lately I've been depressed beyond reason. It's not the nostalgia, but maybe it's just this streak of bad luck. I have no motivation. Every single scholarship application I've applied to this year has ended in rejection. I am not eligible for any positions with stipends at the university. I have no reason to believe I can do well on the LSATs, let alone get accepted by Law school and receive funding while I'm there. I feel like I have wasted an entire year abroad, having learned not a single thing that would contribute to my academic success. Yes, I have come to understand the culture more in China and even the working environment, but I am just so burdened by this load. Maybe I am depressed... and that's why everything seems so downright gray and dismal. Maybe I just need to cry, a good long cry, since I've been holding everything in. It's so downright weak, but maybe after that I'll start thinking like a sane person again.
Oh yeah, one thing I forgot to mention was my recent declining health in lieu with the bad luck. It started out with not being able to sleep, light sensitivity, noise sensitivity, and then dry throat/allergies developing, post-nasal drip starting again, muscle pain, getting food poisoning, and now I think I might have had a minor heart attack. I recall reading somewhere that young people have often had heart attacks without even realizing it. My upper chest cavity all of a sudden had needles in it this afternoon. If voodoo works, this must be what it feels like, because it was like someone was stabbing needles in my chest. It hurt to breathe. While it's subsided now, the pain is still there. What is wrong with me?
Tuesday, May 11, 2010
Journey to the Courthouse
Having been at the firm for the better part of two months now, it has been difficult to get the opportunity to visit an actual courthouse and sit in on a session, namely because of my lack of Chinese identification. It is really a bureaucratic issue, tied up in politics and not wanting a "foreigner" to see the true inner workings of Law in China, but today, I finally was able to go visit one as a result of the corrupt system and networking. Apparently, the judge who was to oversee the case was a close friend of the coworker taking me there.
As we sat in the car riding over to Jiang Ning, my two coworkers were kind of enough to go over the prospect of the case. It wasn't complicated per se, but essentially, due to one tiny typo he made, the case was delayed for an entire year. It proves to show that it's all about money, because the specifics weren't even important, but due to the delay, this would cost their side more money.
However, I think I have been facing a streak of bad luck lately, because much like the other meeting was canceled, this one, the defense failed to show up and had merely settled. I did not get to observe a court proceeding in the end, and watched them sign papers instead. However, at the very minimum, I was grateful to actually see firsthand what a courthouse in China looked like. As my coworkers had explained, Law in China is very relaxed, both in execution and dress code. My coworker wore sneakers and jeans to the courthouse today, and the funny thing was that he wasn't the only one. I think I've come to realize the two crucial differences between Law in China and Law in the US.
In China, Law is for functionality. The standard case takes only 3-4 months to handle, and a majority of people in the nation are encouraged to avoid the courts because that would be a) inefficient, and b) there is simply too great a population for the court systems to handle all the civil disputes between people.
In the US though, Law is based on principle, a value of justice. Everyone is entitled to an attorney, a right to sue, a right to take something up with the courts and even appeal when you are displeased with the ruling. I think this shows the stark difference between the two. As a result, sometimes it feels like China doesn't take the Law seriously enough, but that is in fact only because we treat it as a value, upholding justice. For them, it is simply a system to get things done; there is no moral issue involved.
A funny thing I found while I was visiting the court house was that my coworker pointed to a van. He said that this was a law firm that's been there for years, and consists of 2 people. As I had a face of "No way!" there it was, a van with a sign saying "打官司." I so wish I had a camera on me at the moment, but this is a perfect example of what Law is in China. As long as they get the job done, it's fine. Proper procedure and principle are thrown out the window. China's legal system is indeed interesting.
On a completely separate note, I heard the funniest commentary today on the radio on the way back from the courthouse. Some DJ was commenting on the Expo, and how it was such a wonderful opportunity for people in China to sample different authentic foods from all over the world. He explained that all the foods were imported from their countries. And here was the funny part, he was asking that they lower the price. I think somewhere between his naivette and not thinking about how people run businesses for profit, the Chinese government had given a list of suggested prices that the average citizen in China could afford. I simply thought it was naive. Even if they do not profit, they do need to break even. The radio DJ had said, please don't make it so "高高在上" so that the 普通老百姓 can also try these foods. I don't think he realized it wasn't that they wanted to exclusively target a certain high-class community. These foods are simply that expensive if you want it good. Cheese is not cheap, and to import it all the way from their home country to China is not an easy feat either (consider tariffs and such). We're typically charged 4xs the normal price of things for imported goods, how much more so would this happen in a restaurant at the Expo? I think China is displeased that things aren't going their way because it's not nearly as controlled of an environment as something as short as the Olympics. Oh well, it's a mutual learning experience.
As we sat in the car riding over to Jiang Ning, my two coworkers were kind of enough to go over the prospect of the case. It wasn't complicated per se, but essentially, due to one tiny typo he made, the case was delayed for an entire year. It proves to show that it's all about money, because the specifics weren't even important, but due to the delay, this would cost their side more money.
However, I think I have been facing a streak of bad luck lately, because much like the other meeting was canceled, this one, the defense failed to show up and had merely settled. I did not get to observe a court proceeding in the end, and watched them sign papers instead. However, at the very minimum, I was grateful to actually see firsthand what a courthouse in China looked like. As my coworkers had explained, Law in China is very relaxed, both in execution and dress code. My coworker wore sneakers and jeans to the courthouse today, and the funny thing was that he wasn't the only one. I think I've come to realize the two crucial differences between Law in China and Law in the US.
In China, Law is for functionality. The standard case takes only 3-4 months to handle, and a majority of people in the nation are encouraged to avoid the courts because that would be a) inefficient, and b) there is simply too great a population for the court systems to handle all the civil disputes between people.
In the US though, Law is based on principle, a value of justice. Everyone is entitled to an attorney, a right to sue, a right to take something up with the courts and even appeal when you are displeased with the ruling. I think this shows the stark difference between the two. As a result, sometimes it feels like China doesn't take the Law seriously enough, but that is in fact only because we treat it as a value, upholding justice. For them, it is simply a system to get things done; there is no moral issue involved.
A funny thing I found while I was visiting the court house was that my coworker pointed to a van. He said that this was a law firm that's been there for years, and consists of 2 people. As I had a face of "No way!" there it was, a van with a sign saying "打官司." I so wish I had a camera on me at the moment, but this is a perfect example of what Law is in China. As long as they get the job done, it's fine. Proper procedure and principle are thrown out the window. China's legal system is indeed interesting.
On a completely separate note, I heard the funniest commentary today on the radio on the way back from the courthouse. Some DJ was commenting on the Expo, and how it was such a wonderful opportunity for people in China to sample different authentic foods from all over the world. He explained that all the foods were imported from their countries. And here was the funny part, he was asking that they lower the price. I think somewhere between his naivette and not thinking about how people run businesses for profit, the Chinese government had given a list of suggested prices that the average citizen in China could afford. I simply thought it was naive. Even if they do not profit, they do need to break even. The radio DJ had said, please don't make it so "高高在上" so that the 普通老百姓 can also try these foods. I don't think he realized it wasn't that they wanted to exclusively target a certain high-class community. These foods are simply that expensive if you want it good. Cheese is not cheap, and to import it all the way from their home country to China is not an easy feat either (consider tariffs and such). We're typically charged 4xs the normal price of things for imported goods, how much more so would this happen in a restaurant at the Expo? I think China is displeased that things aren't going their way because it's not nearly as controlled of an environment as something as short as the Olympics. Oh well, it's a mutual learning experience.
Tuesday, May 4, 2010
Weather, Expats, and the Long Weekend
The weather has fortunately finally warmed up, but a part of me is sad, as I had essentially missed out on Spring. Nanjing weather has been odd to say the least, even the locals say so, but it is sad that it went from the low 40-50s and suddenly jumped into the high 80s. I would have enjoyed having a few weeks of 70s weather, but now, it is just warm and muggy. I enjoy the warm weather, but humidity has always been killer for me, and apparently is killing my giant appetite, which would do me some good, since I've gained a considerable amount of weight.
This last weekend was a 3-day weekend, a national holiday that everyone often takes the opportunity to travel. I on the other hand, have grown much too burnt out with the hustle and bustle, and decided to stay at "home" in Nanjing. It was nice to just chill, and really have no tasks to do. It was mainly playing catch up on some much needed tasks, such as cleaning the apartment, sweeping, mopping floors, scrubbing the toilet and such. Probably more detail than anyone needs to know, but it was good to get something done.
On Monday night, Kamla and I went to Sculpting in Time to eat, and met an expat who was teaching as a professor at one of the local universities. I don't mean to complain, but meeting this gentleman was a complete waste of time. We had almost finished dinner and were preparing to go, when this total stranger next to us struck a conversation with us. Having heard us converse in English, he knew that we were probably Americans. Being polite, we thought that the conversation would end quickly, a few questions of where are you from, what are you doing here, and oh, I hope you enjoy your time, nice to meet you and "goodbye!" Little did we know, this man managed to keep us there for an hour, just talking to us.
I found that this "professor" grated at my nerves in ways that I didn't appreciate, though there were some things that he said that were interestingly insightful and perhaps necessary for the average Chinese to know. However, for us, it came off as lecturing, and I didn't appreciate his self-righteous tone as he berated us about not going to see the Great Wall of China, even though we were in Beijing for other business. As my friendly smile turned into a grimace rather quickly, and Kamla and I exchanged frantic looks of how to escape the situation, there were a few things that struck me. This gentleman, as it were, was blatantly lying to himself. As he proudly informed Kamla and I that he had burned all his bridges in the US, and that he had no intention of going back having been in Nanjing for 2.5 years and now has a fiance in Beijing, his incessant talking merely proved to show that he was deprived. He kept telling us that he avoided the expat and foreign community in China, so that he could continue practicing his Chinese, but the fact that he talked at us for an hour proved to show that he missed having an intellectual conversation with people who could not only understand him, but communicate and think for themselves. I think his only justification for talking with us, was that we weren't "white" as it were, and by all means were Chinese to some degree as well.
Although this gentleman had lived in Nanjing for 2.5 years, he was extremely ignorant of the true China. I let a lot of things slide, because there was no point in arguing with a stranger. He had simply assumed it was easier for me as I was Chinese by descent. Granted, I could sympathize with his difficulty of wanting to practice Chinese, but having everyone talk to him in English, I was frustrated with his liberal thinking. He kept saying how relaxing it was to be in China, but China is anything but relaxing, at least for people in our generation in China. However, those are details. What bothered me the most was what he said about the Law. He said: "I fight the Law." For someone who came from the US, it was sad that he had zero appreciation for the enforcement of Law that the US instates, something that I have long missed in China. Working in a law firm has given me a true insight into how things work in China, and it is a corrupt, corrupt system. He on the other hand thought China was just fine, not as corrupt and controlled by foreign banks as the US was. I was frustrated with this ignorant man, who so blindly loved China just because he was dissatisfied with how things in the US were run. I suppose ignorance is bliss, and in this case, it truly was.
I guess this proves to show that even though we have lived in China for a mere 8 months, a majority of us from Flagship have a better grasp of the inner-workings of how China ticks, the culture, and just things that you can't really learn from a book. Even though I was annoyed, it did shed some new light on something I have long forgotten, having become jaded in China.
This last weekend was a 3-day weekend, a national holiday that everyone often takes the opportunity to travel. I on the other hand, have grown much too burnt out with the hustle and bustle, and decided to stay at "home" in Nanjing. It was nice to just chill, and really have no tasks to do. It was mainly playing catch up on some much needed tasks, such as cleaning the apartment, sweeping, mopping floors, scrubbing the toilet and such. Probably more detail than anyone needs to know, but it was good to get something done.
On Monday night, Kamla and I went to Sculpting in Time to eat, and met an expat who was teaching as a professor at one of the local universities. I don't mean to complain, but meeting this gentleman was a complete waste of time. We had almost finished dinner and were preparing to go, when this total stranger next to us struck a conversation with us. Having heard us converse in English, he knew that we were probably Americans. Being polite, we thought that the conversation would end quickly, a few questions of where are you from, what are you doing here, and oh, I hope you enjoy your time, nice to meet you and "goodbye!" Little did we know, this man managed to keep us there for an hour, just talking to us.
I found that this "professor" grated at my nerves in ways that I didn't appreciate, though there were some things that he said that were interestingly insightful and perhaps necessary for the average Chinese to know. However, for us, it came off as lecturing, and I didn't appreciate his self-righteous tone as he berated us about not going to see the Great Wall of China, even though we were in Beijing for other business. As my friendly smile turned into a grimace rather quickly, and Kamla and I exchanged frantic looks of how to escape the situation, there were a few things that struck me. This gentleman, as it were, was blatantly lying to himself. As he proudly informed Kamla and I that he had burned all his bridges in the US, and that he had no intention of going back having been in Nanjing for 2.5 years and now has a fiance in Beijing, his incessant talking merely proved to show that he was deprived. He kept telling us that he avoided the expat and foreign community in China, so that he could continue practicing his Chinese, but the fact that he talked at us for an hour proved to show that he missed having an intellectual conversation with people who could not only understand him, but communicate and think for themselves. I think his only justification for talking with us, was that we weren't "white" as it were, and by all means were Chinese to some degree as well.
Although this gentleman had lived in Nanjing for 2.5 years, he was extremely ignorant of the true China. I let a lot of things slide, because there was no point in arguing with a stranger. He had simply assumed it was easier for me as I was Chinese by descent. Granted, I could sympathize with his difficulty of wanting to practice Chinese, but having everyone talk to him in English, I was frustrated with his liberal thinking. He kept saying how relaxing it was to be in China, but China is anything but relaxing, at least for people in our generation in China. However, those are details. What bothered me the most was what he said about the Law. He said: "I fight the Law." For someone who came from the US, it was sad that he had zero appreciation for the enforcement of Law that the US instates, something that I have long missed in China. Working in a law firm has given me a true insight into how things work in China, and it is a corrupt, corrupt system. He on the other hand thought China was just fine, not as corrupt and controlled by foreign banks as the US was. I was frustrated with this ignorant man, who so blindly loved China just because he was dissatisfied with how things in the US were run. I suppose ignorance is bliss, and in this case, it truly was.
I guess this proves to show that even though we have lived in China for a mere 8 months, a majority of us from Flagship have a better grasp of the inner-workings of how China ticks, the culture, and just things that you can't really learn from a book. Even though I was annoyed, it did shed some new light on something I have long forgotten, having become jaded in China.
Sunday, April 25, 2010
Carcinogens, toxins, radiation and the like
I find it entertainingly hilarious how sensitive some of my coworkers are to these things. At the moment, our firm is currently undergoing a remodeling of sorts, and they are tearing down my boss' office and expanding it to form a meeting room of some sort. Granted, we're still in the building, so we hear and smell everything that goes on. As they use turpentine and stuff, one particular coworker was so freaked out about making sure that the door was closed, lest we get cancer from the fumes that wafted over. I always smirk to myself. This is coming from a man who chain smokes every day. If he was so "concerned" about his "health," then he'd quit smoking.
The same thing goes with microwaves. I always stand close to the microwave and monitor the progress of my food's warming (I guess that's who you could phrase that), and they always freak out that I am standing so close. They say "Be careful of the radiation! Stand back!" Honestly, I'm doused with a good bout of radiation each day. Our computers have radiation, cell phones more than we would like to believe, television, and yes, microwaves too all give a steady flow of radiation, and I don't see them concerned about that. It's just funny to me how they're so concerned about these minute aspects, and don't make any changes about their environment or the polluted air that affects them each and every day. I guess they're afraid of death. I've just accepted it. If I am meant to die by radiation poisoning, I will die that way. There is no stopping it.
Another thing that is entertaining is just their mentality. The movie 2012 was a huge hit in Chinese theaters, and nearly everyone has seen it. However, contrary to what you might think, the feeling it evoked was that of apathy. There's nothing we can do about it (the whole world ending bit), so we should just live our lives the best we can. Some though have considered investing in planes as an escape route as the movie had said, but this reveals a lot about the Chinese mind set. They do not think about a solution to the problem. No, they just think of a way out, an escape plan after everything has collapsed in itself. They don't want to fix the problem, because it is too problematic. Everyone simply continues to act how they act, do whatever they want, abuse the system, because no one will stop them. They will use it until it's so overused that it collapses in on itself, giving out from the pressure. No one wants to be the odd one out, and it is a huge problem in my honest opinion. I can understand wanting unity, but being a mindless unit does no one any good.
The same thing goes with microwaves. I always stand close to the microwave and monitor the progress of my food's warming (I guess that's who you could phrase that), and they always freak out that I am standing so close. They say "Be careful of the radiation! Stand back!" Honestly, I'm doused with a good bout of radiation each day. Our computers have radiation, cell phones more than we would like to believe, television, and yes, microwaves too all give a steady flow of radiation, and I don't see them concerned about that. It's just funny to me how they're so concerned about these minute aspects, and don't make any changes about their environment or the polluted air that affects them each and every day. I guess they're afraid of death. I've just accepted it. If I am meant to die by radiation poisoning, I will die that way. There is no stopping it.
Another thing that is entertaining is just their mentality. The movie 2012 was a huge hit in Chinese theaters, and nearly everyone has seen it. However, contrary to what you might think, the feeling it evoked was that of apathy. There's nothing we can do about it (the whole world ending bit), so we should just live our lives the best we can. Some though have considered investing in planes as an escape route as the movie had said, but this reveals a lot about the Chinese mind set. They do not think about a solution to the problem. No, they just think of a way out, an escape plan after everything has collapsed in itself. They don't want to fix the problem, because it is too problematic. Everyone simply continues to act how they act, do whatever they want, abuse the system, because no one will stop them. They will use it until it's so overused that it collapses in on itself, giving out from the pressure. No one wants to be the odd one out, and it is a huge problem in my honest opinion. I can understand wanting unity, but being a mindless unit does no one any good.
Thursday, April 22, 2010
Relationships
Lately I've been thinking a lot about relationships, whether it is conversations with Kamla or passages in I Corinthians about marriage, it's been something on my mind a lot. Today, as I went to lunch with the intern, we took the opportunity to just walk around since it was the first day in weeks that we've seen the sun. It's just been pouring the past two weeks, bouts of rainstorms and such. So this is definitely a nice reprieve.
One of the very few advantages I have as an American-Chinese in China is that while I blend in the crowds, I am often allowed into the "inner circle" and can see the true face of China. Not to say that the Chinese are superficial, but they typically judge based on looks and trust those with the same "skin" or "face" as it were. It is shocking how easily the Chinese trust one another. If they consider you a friend, it's no holds bar.
Today, as we strolled down the street, the intern bore her soul to me and told me about some of the difficulties she was facing with her relationship. While I won't go in detail, she said essentially that her parents don't want her to see her boyfriend anymore mainly because he does not have the financial ability to support her. She is struggling with this decision, because she likes her boyfriend; he treats her well, and she doesn't want to give up on a relationship like this over an economic consideration.
I think this reveals a stark contrast between American and Chinese culture. As Americans, we are often too emotionally driven. We jump into relationships based on a "feeling." For the Chinese, they are much too practical. In order to marry someone, a man must have a house, a car, and a stable job with a steady income, preferably with education that is slightly higher than the woman's. This just seems too cold, and doesn't consider the individual. Where does happiness come out of all of this?
For the American, although you may like one another, if you do not have the financial capacity to support one another, how can you live happily? You will often get into fights about stupid things, things that you aren't prepared to face together. For the Chinese, how can you be happy if the reason you dove into this marriage was for money? It's much to superficial. Since God is out of the picture here, it seems so silly to me.
While the average American has forgotten or no longer believes, I still believe in the sanctity of marriage. The Lord has brought people together for a reason, and He'll work it out in their lives. I guess what these two lack is balance. If the Chinese would consider people's feelings a little more, marriages wouldn't die so quickly and husbands and wives wouldn't be so distant from one another. If the Americans would use their heads a little and stop thinking elsewhere (as someone would put it as "stop using their downstairs brain and start using their upstairs brain), maybe divorce wouldn't be such a surefire solution to everything. *sigh*
One of the very few advantages I have as an American-Chinese in China is that while I blend in the crowds, I am often allowed into the "inner circle" and can see the true face of China. Not to say that the Chinese are superficial, but they typically judge based on looks and trust those with the same "skin" or "face" as it were. It is shocking how easily the Chinese trust one another. If they consider you a friend, it's no holds bar.
Today, as we strolled down the street, the intern bore her soul to me and told me about some of the difficulties she was facing with her relationship. While I won't go in detail, she said essentially that her parents don't want her to see her boyfriend anymore mainly because he does not have the financial ability to support her. She is struggling with this decision, because she likes her boyfriend; he treats her well, and she doesn't want to give up on a relationship like this over an economic consideration.
I think this reveals a stark contrast between American and Chinese culture. As Americans, we are often too emotionally driven. We jump into relationships based on a "feeling." For the Chinese, they are much too practical. In order to marry someone, a man must have a house, a car, and a stable job with a steady income, preferably with education that is slightly higher than the woman's. This just seems too cold, and doesn't consider the individual. Where does happiness come out of all of this?
For the American, although you may like one another, if you do not have the financial capacity to support one another, how can you live happily? You will often get into fights about stupid things, things that you aren't prepared to face together. For the Chinese, how can you be happy if the reason you dove into this marriage was for money? It's much to superficial. Since God is out of the picture here, it seems so silly to me.
While the average American has forgotten or no longer believes, I still believe in the sanctity of marriage. The Lord has brought people together for a reason, and He'll work it out in their lives. I guess what these two lack is balance. If the Chinese would consider people's feelings a little more, marriages wouldn't die so quickly and husbands and wives wouldn't be so distant from one another. If the Americans would use their heads a little and stop thinking elsewhere (as someone would put it as "stop using their downstairs brain and start using their upstairs brain), maybe divorce wouldn't be such a surefire solution to everything. *sigh*
Wednesday, April 14, 2010
In the mood to write...
Procrastination has hit me rather hard this week, but I think a part of it is just my being fed up with China, or simply my exhaustion. Lately, I have not been sleeping well, and I'm sure I've been having weird dreams, though of what I am not sure.
For the first time in weeks, I slept relatively well last night, and that was only probably due to the fact that I finally turned my heater on in the winter-like weather of late. Some may question my choice of programs to watch right before I go to bed, but I am un-phased by the creepy-crawlies that I see on TV (Supernatural). You would think that it would give me nightmares, but the show typically evokes a "Cool!" from me and then I conk out within minutes.
Maybe it's these naps that I take everyday, but if I don't, I wake up even crankier than the day before. I do not know why I am so irritable as of late, but I am just grumpy. I need to be in a coma-like sleep for a day and just rest up enough for a week, but there's too much to do every weekend. Time is of the essence.
----
One thing that just popped into my mind that reminds me of some things I'm irritated with is just the Chinese and their tendency to compare and be illogical. I don't mean to be negative, but I think I just need to rant what's been boiling inside me lest I pop.
Whenever I go to Kamla's erhu lessons, her teacher always comes up to me to brag and boast about Kamla. Yes, I personally find Kamla extremely talented, but I don't think it's much of the teacher's doing. It just simply irks me to no end that he has to step on others to make himself look better, and this is like a trend in China, as evidenced by the Olympics reporting on CCTV. He always says something along the lines of "I'm such a wonderful teacher aren't I? I really know how to teach people in a short amount of time and jump where needed." He keeps bragging about the rapid pace Kamla's learning the erhu (which in all honesty and fairness is amazing), and then turns to me to ask me about how far I am with the Pipa. The one time my teacher was there, he practically walked all over her, saying stuff like, "What you're not even to that song yet?" Well, I beg your pardon, but I've honestly had less lessons since I started almost 2-3 weeks later. What do you expect?! I think I was annoyed more than anything else, especially since he was kind of rude to my teacher since she was both younger and not as experienced as him. It didn't help that he says this to me every week.
Another thing, as much as I adore Kamla's family, they have exhibited a common trend among Chinese people when making phone calls: calling excessively until you pick up. I've had the experience of having someone call me 15 times because I accidentally left my phone at home and didn't pick up. Since Kamla leaves her phone on silent most of the time, her family often calls me. I'm cool with that, but what I don't understand is this insistence to pop up or talk to someone if they are asleep. I think I've had to wake up Kamla twice because of them over something mediocre, something that could have waited until the next morning, but last night I drew the line. Kamla's uncle called, and he was downstairs (another interesting habit of just showing up without calling in advance, which he really shouldn't considering that Kamla needs to put on her headscarf). I felt bad, but Kamla was sick, from what I'm not sure yet (diagnosis unsuccessful), and he wanted me to wake her up, I think. Or that was the tone I was getting, but for sick people, it is crucial that you get more rest, because during these hours, your body is able to better combat the diseases/germs. As rude as it may have been, I told him I didn't want to wake up Kamla. I don't know if I apologized enough, but I think I'm just tired of this insensitivity to others' needs. I know you want to help, and it's very sweet of you, but this is not the way. Maybe it's just me. When I'm sick, I stay away from others, making sure that I don't spread my germs to other people. I am extremely careful, and exert special precautions say if someone is older or pregnant. I guess not everyone thinks about this, so that is probably why I'm so irritated. I guess I'm just fed up with the way people act in China sometimes. I'm sure it's not just China, but it's just so darn frustrating sometimes.
For the first time in weeks, I slept relatively well last night, and that was only probably due to the fact that I finally turned my heater on in the winter-like weather of late. Some may question my choice of programs to watch right before I go to bed, but I am un-phased by the creepy-crawlies that I see on TV (Supernatural). You would think that it would give me nightmares, but the show typically evokes a "Cool!" from me and then I conk out within minutes.
Maybe it's these naps that I take everyday, but if I don't, I wake up even crankier than the day before. I do not know why I am so irritable as of late, but I am just grumpy. I need to be in a coma-like sleep for a day and just rest up enough for a week, but there's too much to do every weekend. Time is of the essence.
----
One thing that just popped into my mind that reminds me of some things I'm irritated with is just the Chinese and their tendency to compare and be illogical. I don't mean to be negative, but I think I just need to rant what's been boiling inside me lest I pop.
Whenever I go to Kamla's erhu lessons, her teacher always comes up to me to brag and boast about Kamla. Yes, I personally find Kamla extremely talented, but I don't think it's much of the teacher's doing. It just simply irks me to no end that he has to step on others to make himself look better, and this is like a trend in China, as evidenced by the Olympics reporting on CCTV. He always says something along the lines of "I'm such a wonderful teacher aren't I? I really know how to teach people in a short amount of time and jump where needed." He keeps bragging about the rapid pace Kamla's learning the erhu (which in all honesty and fairness is amazing), and then turns to me to ask me about how far I am with the Pipa. The one time my teacher was there, he practically walked all over her, saying stuff like, "What you're not even to that song yet?" Well, I beg your pardon, but I've honestly had less lessons since I started almost 2-3 weeks later. What do you expect?! I think I was annoyed more than anything else, especially since he was kind of rude to my teacher since she was both younger and not as experienced as him. It didn't help that he says this to me every week.
Another thing, as much as I adore Kamla's family, they have exhibited a common trend among Chinese people when making phone calls: calling excessively until you pick up. I've had the experience of having someone call me 15 times because I accidentally left my phone at home and didn't pick up. Since Kamla leaves her phone on silent most of the time, her family often calls me. I'm cool with that, but what I don't understand is this insistence to pop up or talk to someone if they are asleep. I think I've had to wake up Kamla twice because of them over something mediocre, something that could have waited until the next morning, but last night I drew the line. Kamla's uncle called, and he was downstairs (another interesting habit of just showing up without calling in advance, which he really shouldn't considering that Kamla needs to put on her headscarf). I felt bad, but Kamla was sick, from what I'm not sure yet (diagnosis unsuccessful), and he wanted me to wake her up, I think. Or that was the tone I was getting, but for sick people, it is crucial that you get more rest, because during these hours, your body is able to better combat the diseases/germs. As rude as it may have been, I told him I didn't want to wake up Kamla. I don't know if I apologized enough, but I think I'm just tired of this insensitivity to others' needs. I know you want to help, and it's very sweet of you, but this is not the way. Maybe it's just me. When I'm sick, I stay away from others, making sure that I don't spread my germs to other people. I am extremely careful, and exert special precautions say if someone is older or pregnant. I guess not everyone thinks about this, so that is probably why I'm so irritated. I guess I'm just fed up with the way people act in China sometimes. I'm sure it's not just China, but it's just so darn frustrating sometimes.
Tuesday, April 13, 2010
Restaurant Review: Soul Mate
I know that I have no 资格 to really write any food review of any sort, but if you trust my sense of taste and opinion, it wouldn't hurt to share some of my food experiences in Nanjing.
Soul Mate
China is full of hole-in-the-wall restaurants, and often this can be taken quite literally. But in the midst of all these niches, I alongside Kamla made a recent delightful discovery of a place called, Soul Mate. Supposedly French-owned, or so the sign outside their door claims, Soul Mate is a small cafe-restaurant located down a small alleyway called 南秀村. Serving primarily Western foods, nothing particularly "French" other than the crepes, the prices are reasonably set for what you order.
Food
Bacon Hamburger
I was extremely impressed by the bacon hamburger that I ordered twice at Soul Mate, a testament to its consistency. The attention to detail is worth mentioning, as the chef had lightly toasted sesame buns atop the perfectly grilled patty. A stunningly authentic all-beef patty in a nation bereft of normal beef that isn't dry, the patty was grilled to perfection, juicy but completely done. Paired with a slice of white cheese instead of cheddar, the creamy texture of the cheese mixed with the tangy French mustard sauce is a combination that makes you ask for more. Served with freshly fried up french fries, the dish leaves the American feeling rather satisfied. The french fries are a bit of a disappointment due to their oiliness and perhaps overly crispy shell. However, overall, the dish is certainly full of flavor and is not bland as some Chinese-cooked Western foods tend to be. Though by American standards, this might be a mini-hamburger or a "small" one at that, the portions are reasonable for the average female; the male, not so much.
Vegetable Bacon Soup
Pureed, the soup has a somewhat grainy, fiber-y texture, though it retains some of its creaminess from the cream base. It is reminiscent of the soups that are advertised as do-it-yourself with a blender, such as the VitaMix they sell at Costco. The soup is certainly a nice change of pace from the usual cream of mushroom soup that every Chinese-based Western restaurant serves, and is low-sodium, though a dash of salt adds to the flavor much more. But, overall, there is nothing stunning about this soup, but it is a nice accompaniment on a cold day to a meal.
Coffee
Although a cafe, the coffee is disappointing to say the least. Having ordered a caramel coffee, the presentation was nice with an elaborate dobble of whip cream and is drizzled on top with caramel. However, the coffee itself tastes watered-down and bitter, probably from a combination of poor coffee beans and no flavoring. If you need an immediate caffeine fix, this is an option, but it certainly is not cheap and does not seem worth it.
Atmosphere
A walk into the restaurant, and you are greeted by a barista area. The restaurant is two stories, though most customers frequent the first floor. Cozy, each table seats roughly 2-4 persons with comfortable seats and lighting. The restaurant is delightfully quiet compared to oft-boisterous restaurants, and plays delightfully quiet music, mostly French. The tracks do not repeat, or to my knowledge, they do not unlike most Chinese-owned restaurants, and does well to offer a nice area to chat quietly or study. There is free wi-fi.
Service
A delight, the waitresses are attentive to detail, refilling glasses with water without the customer even asking. While this is to be expected in the states, in China, it is virtually impossible unless you're going to some 5-star hotel restaurant. Extremely polite and full of quiet smiles, the waitresses do not make odd comments about customers behind their backs and respectfully serve customers diligently and efficiently, making the overall experience that much more valuable.
Overall Rating
Overall, I would give Soul Mate a 7.5 out of 10 rating. The food is certainly worth it, delicious and pocket-friendly, though the coffee should best be avoided. A good overall ambiance, for every American missing some good Western food, Soul Mate is a cafe restaurant worth paying a visit to for a relaxing time without the frustration of Chinese "customer service."
Soul Mate
China is full of hole-in-the-wall restaurants, and often this can be taken quite literally. But in the midst of all these niches, I alongside Kamla made a recent delightful discovery of a place called, Soul Mate. Supposedly French-owned, or so the sign outside their door claims, Soul Mate is a small cafe-restaurant located down a small alleyway called 南秀村. Serving primarily Western foods, nothing particularly "French" other than the crepes, the prices are reasonably set for what you order.
Food
Bacon Hamburger
I was extremely impressed by the bacon hamburger that I ordered twice at Soul Mate, a testament to its consistency. The attention to detail is worth mentioning, as the chef had lightly toasted sesame buns atop the perfectly grilled patty. A stunningly authentic all-beef patty in a nation bereft of normal beef that isn't dry, the patty was grilled to perfection, juicy but completely done. Paired with a slice of white cheese instead of cheddar, the creamy texture of the cheese mixed with the tangy French mustard sauce is a combination that makes you ask for more. Served with freshly fried up french fries, the dish leaves the American feeling rather satisfied. The french fries are a bit of a disappointment due to their oiliness and perhaps overly crispy shell. However, overall, the dish is certainly full of flavor and is not bland as some Chinese-cooked Western foods tend to be. Though by American standards, this might be a mini-hamburger or a "small" one at that, the portions are reasonable for the average female; the male, not so much.
Vegetable Bacon Soup
Pureed, the soup has a somewhat grainy, fiber-y texture, though it retains some of its creaminess from the cream base. It is reminiscent of the soups that are advertised as do-it-yourself with a blender, such as the VitaMix they sell at Costco. The soup is certainly a nice change of pace from the usual cream of mushroom soup that every Chinese-based Western restaurant serves, and is low-sodium, though a dash of salt adds to the flavor much more. But, overall, there is nothing stunning about this soup, but it is a nice accompaniment on a cold day to a meal.
Coffee
Although a cafe, the coffee is disappointing to say the least. Having ordered a caramel coffee, the presentation was nice with an elaborate dobble of whip cream and is drizzled on top with caramel. However, the coffee itself tastes watered-down and bitter, probably from a combination of poor coffee beans and no flavoring. If you need an immediate caffeine fix, this is an option, but it certainly is not cheap and does not seem worth it.
Atmosphere
A walk into the restaurant, and you are greeted by a barista area. The restaurant is two stories, though most customers frequent the first floor. Cozy, each table seats roughly 2-4 persons with comfortable seats and lighting. The restaurant is delightfully quiet compared to oft-boisterous restaurants, and plays delightfully quiet music, mostly French. The tracks do not repeat, or to my knowledge, they do not unlike most Chinese-owned restaurants, and does well to offer a nice area to chat quietly or study. There is free wi-fi.
Service
A delight, the waitresses are attentive to detail, refilling glasses with water without the customer even asking. While this is to be expected in the states, in China, it is virtually impossible unless you're going to some 5-star hotel restaurant. Extremely polite and full of quiet smiles, the waitresses do not make odd comments about customers behind their backs and respectfully serve customers diligently and efficiently, making the overall experience that much more valuable.
Overall Rating
Overall, I would give Soul Mate a 7.5 out of 10 rating. The food is certainly worth it, delicious and pocket-friendly, though the coffee should best be avoided. A good overall ambiance, for every American missing some good Western food, Soul Mate is a cafe restaurant worth paying a visit to for a relaxing time without the frustration of Chinese "customer service."
Transportation & Bipolar Weather
When China sets its heart out to do something, it gets done. Take today for example. In preparation for the 2014 Youth Olympics, the city of Nanjing has begun its campaign for what could only be called "civilized" behavior. The Chinese call it "文明," which literally could mean culturally aware or some sort of civilized behavior insight of sorts. You know China has set a goal though when there is a sudden onset of mass behavioral changes.
On a typical morning, I am either chasing after buses, slipping and sliding on the steps of or inside the bus, or being thrown around by the sheer momentum of the breaks being slammed on. Today though, apparently there was a new initiative, and the buses for the first time since I've been in China arrived in an orderly fashion. Instead of buses that sped past one another or cut each other off in traffic lanes (old habits die hard), they actually pulled up to a full stop at each bus stop/station and waited for all passengers to get on. It was particularly shocking/stunning to see it for the first time. Instead of zooming past the stop, causing bus riders to chase after them down the street, it was nice that they all just came to a slow roll into the station. I was amazed at the sudden onset of this change, and this goes to show exactly that when China sets it mind on something, it happens. Granted, bus drivers' old habits of switching in and out of lanes to beat one another to the stop was still a frequent practice, but at the very least, they would pull up to the stop completely, which was nice than being dropped off half a block away when the line to the stop was too long.
China is interesting to say the least.
On another note, China really ought to stop messing with the weather, and shooting up those rockets to cloud seed. It's a bad idea, and our current weather predicament is a perfect testament to that. Nanjing traditionally by this time of year has warmed up into a nice 60-70 range. Though short-lived, it is a nice reprieve right before the summer heat and humidity. However, for the past month, the weather has honestly been bipolar. One day it'll be in the high 60s, and literally the next day, it'll drop down to the 30s. I have never seen weather have a 20 degree difference in one day alone, normally it's maybe a 10 degree difference between the low and high, but this is Nanjing at the moment.
Today for instance, in what should be a lovely April, we saw a bit of hail. The weather dropped from 50 to 20 something. It's ridiculous. I never know how to dress appropriately. I'll either wear too much or too little. Layers is my go-to at the moment, but when it changes so frequently, I have to constantly check the weather forecast. Oddly enough, the weather forecast in China is extremely accurate, and it makes me wonder if this is controlled by the Chinese department on meteorological/weather control. Honestly, enough, China! It's about time that the weather go back to normal. I'm convinced this cloud seeding ought to stop, because weather is best left in mother nature's hands. We're likely to mess it up, as evidence it now proving.
On a typical morning, I am either chasing after buses, slipping and sliding on the steps of or inside the bus, or being thrown around by the sheer momentum of the breaks being slammed on. Today though, apparently there was a new initiative, and the buses for the first time since I've been in China arrived in an orderly fashion. Instead of buses that sped past one another or cut each other off in traffic lanes (old habits die hard), they actually pulled up to a full stop at each bus stop/station and waited for all passengers to get on. It was particularly shocking/stunning to see it for the first time. Instead of zooming past the stop, causing bus riders to chase after them down the street, it was nice that they all just came to a slow roll into the station. I was amazed at the sudden onset of this change, and this goes to show exactly that when China sets it mind on something, it happens. Granted, bus drivers' old habits of switching in and out of lanes to beat one another to the stop was still a frequent practice, but at the very least, they would pull up to the stop completely, which was nice than being dropped off half a block away when the line to the stop was too long.
China is interesting to say the least.
On another note, China really ought to stop messing with the weather, and shooting up those rockets to cloud seed. It's a bad idea, and our current weather predicament is a perfect testament to that. Nanjing traditionally by this time of year has warmed up into a nice 60-70 range. Though short-lived, it is a nice reprieve right before the summer heat and humidity. However, for the past month, the weather has honestly been bipolar. One day it'll be in the high 60s, and literally the next day, it'll drop down to the 30s. I have never seen weather have a 20 degree difference in one day alone, normally it's maybe a 10 degree difference between the low and high, but this is Nanjing at the moment.
Today for instance, in what should be a lovely April, we saw a bit of hail. The weather dropped from 50 to 20 something. It's ridiculous. I never know how to dress appropriately. I'll either wear too much or too little. Layers is my go-to at the moment, but when it changes so frequently, I have to constantly check the weather forecast. Oddly enough, the weather forecast in China is extremely accurate, and it makes me wonder if this is controlled by the Chinese department on meteorological/weather control. Honestly, enough, China! It's about time that the weather go back to normal. I'm convinced this cloud seeding ought to stop, because weather is best left in mother nature's hands. We're likely to mess it up, as evidence it now proving.
Thursday, April 8, 2010
Directions
I have often been of the opinion that my sense of fashion (or lack thereof) is distinctly different from the crazy splashes of color, patterns and mix-matched articles of clothing that mainland Chinese so love to adorn themselves with. However, apparently not, because I have completely and utterly blended into and among the local Chinese. One perfect example of this is that I am always asked for directions.
Everyone knows that I honestly should be the last person to ask directions from, as I am directionally challenged. I have no sense of direction and connect/disconnect roads that shouldn't be, so probably a bad idea to ask me; however, I have found that randomly people seem inclined to ask me of all people for directions. When standing at a bus stop full of people, somehow, I am always picked out of the crowd by a total stranger and asked where to go. Just this week, I was asked twice!
Now, I have a theory about all of this. While a truly smart person would walk up and ask the old people, as they honestly know every road and little street you can think of (which in my case would be wise, were it not for the dialect issues), but people tend to always ask the slightly younger female. I think it's because it's less intimidating and women are seen as more "helpful," though most oft I have found that they don't really know where things are. It's a matter of image I think, and the fact that women seem more approachable. Since I fit into those brackets and am full Chinese, I guess I'll just have to accept the fact that people will continue to come up to me and ask me for directions, even though I am a complete foreigner to the city despite living in it for a good 7 months.
Everyone knows that I honestly should be the last person to ask directions from, as I am directionally challenged. I have no sense of direction and connect/disconnect roads that shouldn't be, so probably a bad idea to ask me; however, I have found that randomly people seem inclined to ask me of all people for directions. When standing at a bus stop full of people, somehow, I am always picked out of the crowd by a total stranger and asked where to go. Just this week, I was asked twice!
Now, I have a theory about all of this. While a truly smart person would walk up and ask the old people, as they honestly know every road and little street you can think of (which in my case would be wise, were it not for the dialect issues), but people tend to always ask the slightly younger female. I think it's because it's less intimidating and women are seen as more "helpful," though most oft I have found that they don't really know where things are. It's a matter of image I think, and the fact that women seem more approachable. Since I fit into those brackets and am full Chinese, I guess I'll just have to accept the fact that people will continue to come up to me and ask me for directions, even though I am a complete foreigner to the city despite living in it for a good 7 months.
Wednesday, April 7, 2010
Mastering the Art of Brevity
So, as of late, I have truly enjoyed browsing other people's blogs, reading the snippets about their lives and enjoying the little golden nuggets of wisdom that they have to offer. In particular, one major thing that struck me was that I honestly do not write concisely enough. My mother has always called me long-winded (quite literally in Chinese), but now I have come to realize that yes, I am not succinct. So instead of my essay-long/book-long messages, I will try a short one for today. See? Succinct.
Monday, April 5, 2010
Alternate Plans
So, as of late, I have had this wild inkling to pursue being a part-time food critic. Haha. How wonderful would it be to go and eat food for a living and just share your experiences, both wonderful and poor with the world (okay, maybe that's too grand, but to your readers)?
I love eating, and I think our family as a whole really have the traditional Chinese value of 食为先. Perhaps a little too much so, but a good portion of our conservations and time is spent on thinking what would be good to eat! Haha, no wonder we all have trouble losing weight in general. But I digress. Anyhow, I may give it a shot just for funzies, but that will be contingent on two things:
1) My ability to write well;
2) A capacity to describe foods well/cooking knowledge.
*sigh* Both are still in the works, so that idea may be in the distant future, but I may try to review a few dishes in the future just to give the idea a shot. =]
I love eating, and I think our family as a whole really have the traditional Chinese value of 食为先. Perhaps a little too much so, but a good portion of our conservations and time is spent on thinking what would be good to eat! Haha, no wonder we all have trouble losing weight in general. But I digress. Anyhow, I may give it a shot just for funzies, but that will be contingent on two things:
1) My ability to write well;
2) A capacity to describe foods well/cooking knowledge.
*sigh* Both are still in the works, so that idea may be in the distant future, but I may try to review a few dishes in the future just to give the idea a shot. =]
Mixed Feelings, Review: Supernatural
I will be the first to admit that I am an avid fan of the TV show Supernatural, previously owned by WB, but the now CW network. When my aunt first showed me the promotional pictures her department was doing for the show, I was a skeptic due to the seemingly dark nature of the show, but after getting past my personal misgivings, I fell in love with the show from the first episode on.
Supernatural is an amazingly well-written show. With gifted minds as Eric Kripke and Ben Edlund behind the scenes, it is startling how far the show went from the monster-hunting debacle to the anti-Apocalypse-driven brethren. Reading back on some quotations, I was startled on the dark path the show had taken. The tone of the show shifted from the snarky bantering duo to two desperate brothers seeking an end, one wanting peace, the other redemption. My family has always found it odd that I am drawn to such dark stories. They call it too 邪, I suppose that would be "evil," but it is not so much the content of it as it is the dynamics. Whereas a majority of television today focus on the superficial relationships, teenagers jumping into bed with one another, this show speaks of the bonds between family members, whether by blood or by circumstance.
With the past 2 season arcs delving into a lot more biblical content, angels, demons, revelations, the apocalypse, I have had mixed feelings about this. While I am indeed not happy with their interpretation of angels as almost fickle, unfeeling creatures, it did bring to light some questions I have always had. How does an angel fall from grace? They too exhibit free will. How then are they governed? And how are they measured for salvation? Watching this show is addicting, and dangerous for those who only blindly follow the lore. It does not do Christianity justice, and if you knew little of Revelations, the smattering of truth here and there could easily confuse you. However, I must say though that it brings to light a lot of things in its reinterpretation of the book of Revelations.
Revelations constantly reminds us to stay alert, and to be on guard for the coming signs of the end times. And yet, these "signs" are often so abstract that we wonder is it just a symbolic representation of what is to come or a prophesy of the actual manifestations of these "signs"? Supernatural does a good job then in that it makes you wonder: are the End Times already here? And with the recent earthquakes, I would say that the signs are manifesting for its onset. I think it then serves as a good reminder that perhaps we are already smack dab in the middle of it, but don't even realize it because these signs are hidden among us. We often put off these warnings as signs way down the line in the future, but if things were as Supernatural puts it, happening in the here and now around us, would we act so nonchalantly? It makes me care more, and to reflect on my actions and priorities in light of what is to come.
This is definitely one of the major pluses of the show for me personally. It is entertaining, but it also serves as a good brain tease, getting me to think and to delve more into my Bible. However, the episode last night, while equally entertaining left me with a bitter taste in my mouth. I am tired of the show's direction in pounding the two main characters with set back after set back, and now that they have found the so-called "mouthpiece of God," the portrayal of God the Father as some deadbeat dad did not sit well with me. That is one of the major negative points of the show, the fact that it portrays God as having forsaken the human race, or as some distant Father. It takes a very dogmatist appeal to it, and I did not like that.
No, the Father is very real, and is with us everyday. He loves us dearly, cares for us, watches over us, and sacrifices for us. To say that God is a "deadbeat dad" was downright offensive. The fact that the writers took liberties with what God's attitude is with towards the Apocalypse downright bothered me. In Season 5 Episode 16, the episode I watched last night, the angel said that God quite frankly doesn't care about the Apocalypse because it had nothing to do with him. But in fact, the Apocalypse has everything to do with Him! It is about Christ's return, of His wrath poured out against those that do not repent, and is of the day when Christ conquers Satan and brings a new heaven and earth for those who believe. It all sounds so cultish or like crazy-talk, but Revelations is really a period of hope, that although we may experience all this temporary pain, peace is to follow. Regardless, the Apocalypse story arc in Supernatural is drawing to a close in the next 5 episodes, or so the writers purport. I still look forward to it, and am hoping that this whole "deadbeat dad" character was merely a ploy to further the story and not how they will actually portray God. As a nation, people have become so entangled with their own lives that they no longer believe in a god of any sort. It's so tragic and hopeless. I hope the writers take a more uplifting note from there and give people some hope of some sort, at least to the fans that are way too obsessed with the lore. They could use some hope.
Supernatural is an amazingly well-written show. With gifted minds as Eric Kripke and Ben Edlund behind the scenes, it is startling how far the show went from the monster-hunting debacle to the anti-Apocalypse-driven brethren. Reading back on some quotations, I was startled on the dark path the show had taken. The tone of the show shifted from the snarky bantering duo to two desperate brothers seeking an end, one wanting peace, the other redemption. My family has always found it odd that I am drawn to such dark stories. They call it too 邪, I suppose that would be "evil," but it is not so much the content of it as it is the dynamics. Whereas a majority of television today focus on the superficial relationships, teenagers jumping into bed with one another, this show speaks of the bonds between family members, whether by blood or by circumstance.
With the past 2 season arcs delving into a lot more biblical content, angels, demons, revelations, the apocalypse, I have had mixed feelings about this. While I am indeed not happy with their interpretation of angels as almost fickle, unfeeling creatures, it did bring to light some questions I have always had. How does an angel fall from grace? They too exhibit free will. How then are they governed? And how are they measured for salvation? Watching this show is addicting, and dangerous for those who only blindly follow the lore. It does not do Christianity justice, and if you knew little of Revelations, the smattering of truth here and there could easily confuse you. However, I must say though that it brings to light a lot of things in its reinterpretation of the book of Revelations.
Revelations constantly reminds us to stay alert, and to be on guard for the coming signs of the end times. And yet, these "signs" are often so abstract that we wonder is it just a symbolic representation of what is to come or a prophesy of the actual manifestations of these "signs"? Supernatural does a good job then in that it makes you wonder: are the End Times already here? And with the recent earthquakes, I would say that the signs are manifesting for its onset. I think it then serves as a good reminder that perhaps we are already smack dab in the middle of it, but don't even realize it because these signs are hidden among us. We often put off these warnings as signs way down the line in the future, but if things were as Supernatural puts it, happening in the here and now around us, would we act so nonchalantly? It makes me care more, and to reflect on my actions and priorities in light of what is to come.
This is definitely one of the major pluses of the show for me personally. It is entertaining, but it also serves as a good brain tease, getting me to think and to delve more into my Bible. However, the episode last night, while equally entertaining left me with a bitter taste in my mouth. I am tired of the show's direction in pounding the two main characters with set back after set back, and now that they have found the so-called "mouthpiece of God," the portrayal of God the Father as some deadbeat dad did not sit well with me. That is one of the major negative points of the show, the fact that it portrays God as having forsaken the human race, or as some distant Father. It takes a very dogmatist appeal to it, and I did not like that.
No, the Father is very real, and is with us everyday. He loves us dearly, cares for us, watches over us, and sacrifices for us. To say that God is a "deadbeat dad" was downright offensive. The fact that the writers took liberties with what God's attitude is with towards the Apocalypse downright bothered me. In Season 5 Episode 16, the episode I watched last night, the angel said that God quite frankly doesn't care about the Apocalypse because it had nothing to do with him. But in fact, the Apocalypse has everything to do with Him! It is about Christ's return, of His wrath poured out against those that do not repent, and is of the day when Christ conquers Satan and brings a new heaven and earth for those who believe. It all sounds so cultish or like crazy-talk, but Revelations is really a period of hope, that although we may experience all this temporary pain, peace is to follow. Regardless, the Apocalypse story arc in Supernatural is drawing to a close in the next 5 episodes, or so the writers purport. I still look forward to it, and am hoping that this whole "deadbeat dad" character was merely a ploy to further the story and not how they will actually portray God. As a nation, people have become so entangled with their own lives that they no longer believe in a god of any sort. It's so tragic and hopeless. I hope the writers take a more uplifting note from there and give people some hope of some sort, at least to the fans that are way too obsessed with the lore. They could use some hope.
Sunday, April 4, 2010
复活节 He has Risen!
I know I've been in China too long if I did not even realize it was Easter. Were it not for the timely reminder of my parents, I may have passed one of the greatest holidays ever with the thought of only 清明 (Chinese Memorial Day).
Sadly, I did not go to an evening service of any sort to celebrate the joyous occasion, but on Good Friday, I read from the latter part of Luke. Today, I read from Mark 13-16, and it covered the final moments leading up until Jesus' death on the cross as well as his ascension back into heaven. I think we are often miffed by the commercialism of Easter, and having heard the story of Christ's crucifixion on the cross one too many times that we forget how great a sacrifice it was that He made on the cross.
Reading through these passages once again at an older age, has given me a greater insight and appreciation of all the Lord had sacrificed in order to save us. Some things that I have never noticed about Jesus' final moments until now is that up until His death, He continued to remember us all. Rather than release His burden, if only emotionally, the Lord spent His final days advising His disciples to stay wary, prophesizing of the times to come when He returns. He not only continued to think only of our welfare as a people, but He also was preparing us as a Body for what is to come. This is such a demonstration of His love for us, so much so that this agape love would lead Him to die for us on the cross.
Also, the selflessness that the Lord demonstrated truly touched me. He did not consider His own needs or His own sorrows as He approached Death. Instead, He thought of us, and how He would save us. When Jesus was praying at Gethsemane, Christ did not pray that the Father would lift this cup from Him out of His own need, but from the will of the Lord. It is indeed awe-inspiring.
Lastly, it breaks my heart as I read these passages to see the suffering the Lord endured. It just makes His sacrifice all the much greater. Mark 15:19-20 "Again and again they struck him on the head with a staff and spit on him. Falling on their knees, they paid homage to him. And when they had mocked him, they took off the purple robe and put his own clothes on him. Then they led him out to crucify him." Jesus was flogged, spat on, mocked, jeered at, criticized. He endured it all without so much as a retort, but accepting it as the will of heaven. I could not imagine being in His shoes, even if I were to merely go through the actions halfheartedly. I doubt I could imitate His submission to the Father's will. And yet what struck me the most was that He was completely innocent. He was neither guilty by Heaven's laws or by the laws of man. Blameless, Jesus was sent to the cross in order that we may have a chance to be redeemed, so that in our righteous state, we might be with Him for eternity.
Indeed, blessed are those who have come to know the Lord and stand on His behalf as witnesses to this world for His message. I am blessed and am grateful for all that He has given me, namely the free gift of salvation as the greatest gift of all.
Easter has always seemed such an inappropriate name. It neglects to mention or at least refer to the wonderfulness of the day that we commemorate. Surprisingly, the Chinese name is better, 复活节, meaning resurrection holiday. It is sad though that even though they have this name, many Chinese have no idea what this day means for them and what a great gift the Lord has given them in His sacrifice... They do not know the true meaning of Easter, and for that I am sad that no one will share my joy today in Nanjing with me. While somewhat depressing, I am still encouraged and rejoice for I know that the Lord has risen and it is a good day indeed!
Sadly, I did not go to an evening service of any sort to celebrate the joyous occasion, but on Good Friday, I read from the latter part of Luke. Today, I read from Mark 13-16, and it covered the final moments leading up until Jesus' death on the cross as well as his ascension back into heaven. I think we are often miffed by the commercialism of Easter, and having heard the story of Christ's crucifixion on the cross one too many times that we forget how great a sacrifice it was that He made on the cross.
Reading through these passages once again at an older age, has given me a greater insight and appreciation of all the Lord had sacrificed in order to save us. Some things that I have never noticed about Jesus' final moments until now is that up until His death, He continued to remember us all. Rather than release His burden, if only emotionally, the Lord spent His final days advising His disciples to stay wary, prophesizing of the times to come when He returns. He not only continued to think only of our welfare as a people, but He also was preparing us as a Body for what is to come. This is such a demonstration of His love for us, so much so that this agape love would lead Him to die for us on the cross.
Also, the selflessness that the Lord demonstrated truly touched me. He did not consider His own needs or His own sorrows as He approached Death. Instead, He thought of us, and how He would save us. When Jesus was praying at Gethsemane, Christ did not pray that the Father would lift this cup from Him out of His own need, but from the will of the Lord. It is indeed awe-inspiring.
Lastly, it breaks my heart as I read these passages to see the suffering the Lord endured. It just makes His sacrifice all the much greater. Mark 15:19-20 "Again and again they struck him on the head with a staff and spit on him. Falling on their knees, they paid homage to him. And when they had mocked him, they took off the purple robe and put his own clothes on him. Then they led him out to crucify him." Jesus was flogged, spat on, mocked, jeered at, criticized. He endured it all without so much as a retort, but accepting it as the will of heaven. I could not imagine being in His shoes, even if I were to merely go through the actions halfheartedly. I doubt I could imitate His submission to the Father's will. And yet what struck me the most was that He was completely innocent. He was neither guilty by Heaven's laws or by the laws of man. Blameless, Jesus was sent to the cross in order that we may have a chance to be redeemed, so that in our righteous state, we might be with Him for eternity.
Indeed, blessed are those who have come to know the Lord and stand on His behalf as witnesses to this world for His message. I am blessed and am grateful for all that He has given me, namely the free gift of salvation as the greatest gift of all.
Easter has always seemed such an inappropriate name. It neglects to mention or at least refer to the wonderfulness of the day that we commemorate. Surprisingly, the Chinese name is better, 复活节, meaning resurrection holiday. It is sad though that even though they have this name, many Chinese have no idea what this day means for them and what a great gift the Lord has given them in His sacrifice... They do not know the true meaning of Easter, and for that I am sad that no one will share my joy today in Nanjing with me. While somewhat depressing, I am still encouraged and rejoice for I know that the Lord has risen and it is a good day indeed!
Wednesday, March 31, 2010
Stressful Clerical Work
I know clerical work and "stress" don't typically go together in a sentence, but today was indeed one of the most stressful clerical work experience I have ever had in my life.
On resumes, clerical work sounds so mundane and simple, but somehow when you're in China, it is an unforeseen obstacle that you have to hurl yourself over. I often have little to nothing to do in the office, and am left to my own mischief, granted free internet access and a free meal a day. Today though, I was given more opportunities, but it may have been over my head. What is perceived as a simple task of typing up a handwritten 5-page document is in fact like trying to read some alien language written backwards and upside down. Yes, it was that difficult.
I've been studying Chinese since I was 5, but somehow handwritten Chinese is still some foreign script to me, especially in simplified Chinese. I blame it on the reduced strokes in each character, which makes guessing that much harder. Combined with the fact that it is 草字, written in Chinese shorthand, and my boss has bad handwriting, I was panicked as to how I could turn this in to him at the end of the day. In theory, it wasn't hard at all. I mean, yes, I can type Chinese just fine, and my average wpm is faster than all the people in my office. However, my main problem was deciphering what my boss had written on the page. To give an example of the difficulties I had, his "人" looked like an "L", and his “发” looked like a scribbled 3 with maybe a stray dot. Fortunately I was not reduced to tears out of frustration, and did my best to type what I could understand, leaving everything else (a large majority) in question marks. I then asked my coworkers to read it out to me instead, as I could type as fast as they could read. I felt bad, because it was 5 pages long, but I seriously could not have finished it otherwise. It took 3 of us combined to get it done, but even then, there were parts that we couldn't decipher from his poor handwriting. Most stressful ordeal ever, something that topped my translation of the equity transfer agreement, since this was for my boss, the boss of everyone at the entire firm. The language itself wasn't hard, maybe in reality 5-10 words I didn't know of the entire document. It was just that I couldn't read his handwriting. “国” looked like "网," so my eyes were crossed like three times over trying to figure out what was what. However, I think I started getting used to it. I may have simply needed a legend. This = this character, because while his handwriting was difficult to read, it did have a certain level of uniformity, and when they could not help me, I could go back and see what a similar squiggle was and apply it to a latter part of the document.
I also sent out an EMS today for another coworker who had to leave early to court in another city (poor lady). Semi-stressful, but the task was easy compared to before. I simply had to copy the information onto the form correctly (which thankfully was very legible; she kindly took into consideration of my limited Chinese skills and wrote it as clearly as she could) and give the money to the delivery man. I think this experience has gone to show me that A) I seriously need like a Chinese 101 in deciphering 草字/Chinese cursive, B) my Chinese needs some major improvement, it's all gone downhill without the academic environment, and C) I need to keep up with my reading skills, because while I actually know a lot of characters, I'm never certain whether I was right, even though my instinct is usually dead on. *sigh* All in due time. Am excited to meet up with all the Nanjing Flagship kids tomorrow though for hot pot! It'll be nice to catch up.
On resumes, clerical work sounds so mundane and simple, but somehow when you're in China, it is an unforeseen obstacle that you have to hurl yourself over. I often have little to nothing to do in the office, and am left to my own mischief, granted free internet access and a free meal a day. Today though, I was given more opportunities, but it may have been over my head. What is perceived as a simple task of typing up a handwritten 5-page document is in fact like trying to read some alien language written backwards and upside down. Yes, it was that difficult.
I've been studying Chinese since I was 5, but somehow handwritten Chinese is still some foreign script to me, especially in simplified Chinese. I blame it on the reduced strokes in each character, which makes guessing that much harder. Combined with the fact that it is 草字, written in Chinese shorthand, and my boss has bad handwriting, I was panicked as to how I could turn this in to him at the end of the day. In theory, it wasn't hard at all. I mean, yes, I can type Chinese just fine, and my average wpm is faster than all the people in my office. However, my main problem was deciphering what my boss had written on the page. To give an example of the difficulties I had, his "人" looked like an "L", and his “发” looked like a scribbled 3 with maybe a stray dot. Fortunately I was not reduced to tears out of frustration, and did my best to type what I could understand, leaving everything else (a large majority) in question marks. I then asked my coworkers to read it out to me instead, as I could type as fast as they could read. I felt bad, because it was 5 pages long, but I seriously could not have finished it otherwise. It took 3 of us combined to get it done, but even then, there were parts that we couldn't decipher from his poor handwriting. Most stressful ordeal ever, something that topped my translation of the equity transfer agreement, since this was for my boss, the boss of everyone at the entire firm. The language itself wasn't hard, maybe in reality 5-10 words I didn't know of the entire document. It was just that I couldn't read his handwriting. “国” looked like "网," so my eyes were crossed like three times over trying to figure out what was what. However, I think I started getting used to it. I may have simply needed a legend. This = this character, because while his handwriting was difficult to read, it did have a certain level of uniformity, and when they could not help me, I could go back and see what a similar squiggle was and apply it to a latter part of the document.
I also sent out an EMS today for another coworker who had to leave early to court in another city (poor lady). Semi-stressful, but the task was easy compared to before. I simply had to copy the information onto the form correctly (which thankfully was very legible; she kindly took into consideration of my limited Chinese skills and wrote it as clearly as she could) and give the money to the delivery man. I think this experience has gone to show me that A) I seriously need like a Chinese 101 in deciphering 草字/Chinese cursive, B) my Chinese needs some major improvement, it's all gone downhill without the academic environment, and C) I need to keep up with my reading skills, because while I actually know a lot of characters, I'm never certain whether I was right, even though my instinct is usually dead on. *sigh* All in due time. Am excited to meet up with all the Nanjing Flagship kids tomorrow though for hot pot! It'll be nice to catch up.
Monday, March 29, 2010
More Internship Observations
An agitated “coworker” stormed back into the office today after going to court for her client in the 鼓楼 municipal court. As she began to unload her frustrations on her coworkers, I sat there somewhat clueless as to what it was all about. I had written before about the issue of judges and the corrupt system in which they are selected, and this was just one of the prime examples of why China’s legal system needs some serious revamping.
In the front of our office, there is a list of principles that the lawyers at my law firm abide by, and all the lawyers in our firm truly keep one to heart above all else: having the client’s best interests at heart. In this particular case, it was an issue about worker’s compensation, I believe, and was between an insurance company and my coworker’s client. Essentially, they wanted to only pay for the period of time her client was injured, deducting all the taxes, when in reality, the insurance company is supposed to cover much more than that. I wasn’t sure entirely how it all worked out mathematically, but the insurance company was somehow not paying enough, and was going by the wrong numbers. My coworker came back really upset mainly because her client was not going to get the money he needed, and the judge was too ignorant of the Law to 判 the right decision. As she began consulting with the other legal staff, the lawyer in our firm with the most expertise in the area confirmed that she was completely right, and that in a similar case he had done before, it was equally frustrating to get the judge to understand what the law exactly dictates about this area.
My coworker, 范姐, was not necessarily in hysterics, but pretty darn near close to it. She was so frustrated by the judge and his lack of insight into the Law. I don’t blame her. Considering that the average judge has little to no background in Law other than the 1 year of self-study and experience in the field, their judgment is often a bit skewed. They demand that the lawyers provide the actual article written in the law itself, printing off a copy for them to keep, when in practicality, the judge should already know what the law says. The lawyers have these for personal reference, so it is sort of preposterous that the judges are completely clueless. Essentially, due to this, a lawyer’s job is to find the most evidence for their stance and prove it to the judge, convincing him/her to side with their client. The judge merely makes a decision, and has little work to do himself. No wonder the competition to become a court judge is so intense lately. You don’t need to know very much, and you end up taking the credit for others’ work and make a lot of money in the process.
In the front of our office, there is a list of principles that the lawyers at my law firm abide by, and all the lawyers in our firm truly keep one to heart above all else: having the client’s best interests at heart. In this particular case, it was an issue about worker’s compensation, I believe, and was between an insurance company and my coworker’s client. Essentially, they wanted to only pay for the period of time her client was injured, deducting all the taxes, when in reality, the insurance company is supposed to cover much more than that. I wasn’t sure entirely how it all worked out mathematically, but the insurance company was somehow not paying enough, and was going by the wrong numbers. My coworker came back really upset mainly because her client was not going to get the money he needed, and the judge was too ignorant of the Law to 判 the right decision. As she began consulting with the other legal staff, the lawyer in our firm with the most expertise in the area confirmed that she was completely right, and that in a similar case he had done before, it was equally frustrating to get the judge to understand what the law exactly dictates about this area.
My coworker, 范姐, was not necessarily in hysterics, but pretty darn near close to it. She was so frustrated by the judge and his lack of insight into the Law. I don’t blame her. Considering that the average judge has little to no background in Law other than the 1 year of self-study and experience in the field, their judgment is often a bit skewed. They demand that the lawyers provide the actual article written in the law itself, printing off a copy for them to keep, when in practicality, the judge should already know what the law says. The lawyers have these for personal reference, so it is sort of preposterous that the judges are completely clueless. Essentially, due to this, a lawyer’s job is to find the most evidence for their stance and prove it to the judge, convincing him/her to side with their client. The judge merely makes a decision, and has little work to do himself. No wonder the competition to become a court judge is so intense lately. You don’t need to know very much, and you end up taking the credit for others’ work and make a lot of money in the process.
Something Missing...
Over the past month, I have oft blogged about the issue of Chinese and their sense of loneliness. I have mostly reasoned this as a sort of cultural/social bind, but I think I have missed the spiritual aspect about all of this.
Granted, the average Chinese is too engrossed in their work place to really develop any relationships, prioritizing monetary needs and a hunger for power above something as traditional a value as family. Ignored and lost in an education system that simply drills government-approved information (I do not say knowledge, because this is not really learning) into their heads, it isn't hard to see that these people are lonely. Yet, they are empty inside, and I think it is this spiritual emptiness that makes them nervous of being by themselves.
Since religion is virtually nonexistent in China due to the Cultural Revolution, something is seriously missing in their lives. Regardless of whichever religion it may be--though I myself believe that there is only one true way, I think religion often gives people a purpose, a reason for being, and a conduct of both the physical person as well as the spiritual self. Since the average Chinese is missing this one key component, they feel lost and helpless in this pointless cycle of climbing to the top, when in the end, all the material gains they have made will simply fade away. I think it finally hit me that it is really this religious void inside them that makes them so lonely and desperate for attention of any sort. They don't want to be by themselves, because they fear they will discover how pointless their lifestyle is in the end. For some, to compensate, they drink it away, smoke their lungs out, and drown themselves in the noise of the party life, but they come out empty nonetheless. For others, they are alone by themselves in an empty room on the weekend without knowing what to do with themselves other than play an online game that will virtually "connect" them with someone somehow. It is all rather tragic, and it pains me to realize this somehow. I honestly want to reach out to them somehow, but it's hard to know how to respond appropriately.
---
On a separate tangent, religion related, today, Kamla and I had dinner at Sculpting in Time. As I talked to Kamla, I watched her eyes narrow into slits as her expression grew darker by the minute. I have never seen her so angry, but as we left in a hurry, I found out that in the table behind me, a bunch of college-aged students were pointing and laughing at Kamla's headscarf, essentially making fun of her religion. It was really all too rude, but I think it is their ignorance that caused it. Granted, ignorance is no excuse for being completely rude, but since they have so little interaction with religion of any sort, I think that what they could not understand, they decided to make sport of. I felt terrible for Kamla. I honestly think she has it the hardest here in China. Being an American-born Chinese is hard enough in China, but combined with being Muslim, it is sometimes unbearable. The pointing and curious expressions she could deal with, but today was probably the last straw when they blatantly were making fun of her religion. Indeed, Kamla only had 2 hours total of sleep (nap included) today, but if I were in her shoes, I would have had an equally difficult time. While she did not dwell on it, or tried not to, I could visibly tell that she was distraught. I often wish that I could shield her from such prying eyes, but it's tough when she's more sensitive to their looks and stares (as she probably has already gotten in the American society). I really should have been more observant, and will keep an eye out for it next time. I'll stand up for her, if that's what it takes. I just wish that this experience will simply fade away soon in her mind. I don't want it to scar her experience here in China.
Granted, the average Chinese is too engrossed in their work place to really develop any relationships, prioritizing monetary needs and a hunger for power above something as traditional a value as family. Ignored and lost in an education system that simply drills government-approved information (I do not say knowledge, because this is not really learning) into their heads, it isn't hard to see that these people are lonely. Yet, they are empty inside, and I think it is this spiritual emptiness that makes them nervous of being by themselves.
Since religion is virtually nonexistent in China due to the Cultural Revolution, something is seriously missing in their lives. Regardless of whichever religion it may be--though I myself believe that there is only one true way, I think religion often gives people a purpose, a reason for being, and a conduct of both the physical person as well as the spiritual self. Since the average Chinese is missing this one key component, they feel lost and helpless in this pointless cycle of climbing to the top, when in the end, all the material gains they have made will simply fade away. I think it finally hit me that it is really this religious void inside them that makes them so lonely and desperate for attention of any sort. They don't want to be by themselves, because they fear they will discover how pointless their lifestyle is in the end. For some, to compensate, they drink it away, smoke their lungs out, and drown themselves in the noise of the party life, but they come out empty nonetheless. For others, they are alone by themselves in an empty room on the weekend without knowing what to do with themselves other than play an online game that will virtually "connect" them with someone somehow. It is all rather tragic, and it pains me to realize this somehow. I honestly want to reach out to them somehow, but it's hard to know how to respond appropriately.
---
On a separate tangent, religion related, today, Kamla and I had dinner at Sculpting in Time. As I talked to Kamla, I watched her eyes narrow into slits as her expression grew darker by the minute. I have never seen her so angry, but as we left in a hurry, I found out that in the table behind me, a bunch of college-aged students were pointing and laughing at Kamla's headscarf, essentially making fun of her religion. It was really all too rude, but I think it is their ignorance that caused it. Granted, ignorance is no excuse for being completely rude, but since they have so little interaction with religion of any sort, I think that what they could not understand, they decided to make sport of. I felt terrible for Kamla. I honestly think she has it the hardest here in China. Being an American-born Chinese is hard enough in China, but combined with being Muslim, it is sometimes unbearable. The pointing and curious expressions she could deal with, but today was probably the last straw when they blatantly were making fun of her religion. Indeed, Kamla only had 2 hours total of sleep (nap included) today, but if I were in her shoes, I would have had an equally difficult time. While she did not dwell on it, or tried not to, I could visibly tell that she was distraught. I often wish that I could shield her from such prying eyes, but it's tough when she's more sensitive to their looks and stares (as she probably has already gotten in the American society). I really should have been more observant, and will keep an eye out for it next time. I'll stand up for her, if that's what it takes. I just wish that this experience will simply fade away soon in her mind. I don't want it to scar her experience here in China.
Sunday, March 28, 2010
A Magnet to Cuteness
Kamla has often referred to me as a “Baby Magnet,” and that is not entirely inaccurate, but somehow it makes it sound like babies are attracted to me. No, in fact it is the other way around: I am a sucker for cuteness. I think China is pact full of cuteness in bundles, and I mean that both literally and figuratively.
With a population of 1.3 billion people, the ratio of babies to adults in China is something ridiculous like 1:5. It may sound like an exaggeration, but I honestly see Chinese babies everywhere, and they are simply adorable. I am squealing inside as I write this. My mother has often found my love of children so contradictory. I love kids, but do not want any of my own. Well, that is not entirely accurate, because I am very open to the idea of adoption, but I think it all depends on whether the Lord chooses to bless me with a husband in the future. Either way, it is not something I care to waste too many brain cells worrying about. The Lord provides abundantly, and at my current place in life, I enjoy goo-ga-ga-ing over all the adorable children in the lovely city of Nanjing.
Due to the really damp winters that Nanjing has, babies are often wrapped up to the point that they look like marshmallow penguins, so stuffed full of layers that their arms stick out perpendicular to their little bodies. For the occasional few children that actually walk themselves in the city, I have often found them waddling down the sidewalk with a grandmother trailing behind them. The thick layers inhibit free movement, and thus, it is so cute to watch as they struggle to balance themselves and walk down the street. I however, feel bad for these children though as the weather has begun to warm up. While their parents are down to 2 layers of clothing, these poor kids are red in the faces with still another 10 layers of clothing on. Regardless though, I adore the kids here in China. They are simply precious.
I guess I have always just had an eye to spot cuteness, because no matter where I am, I will spot the mother hoisting a child over her shoulder across the street. Kamla will always spin around like three times, as I point frantically at the cute baby, and she’s like, “how did you even notice that?” I guess I really am a magnet to babies.
But at the same time, I think I have a soft spot for all things cuddly, fuzzy, and cute. I spot tiny birds like no other, and dogs as if they were the most precious things in the world. In the community where I live, a neighbor across from our building had purchased a puppy a couple of months back. However, from what I have observed, Chinese do not enjoy physically petting their pets as much as we do. In fact, physical interaction or affection with their pets is slim to none. At first, the puppy was super hyper. The friendly creature it was, it would go greet everyone and say “hi!” I cannot resist puppy eyes on any creature, and pet him whenever I get the chance to. However, after a mild scolding from his owner one time, and probably some training of some sort, he was a little more hesitant to come and greet me. However, I still walk over to him and let him sniff me, so that I can pet him. This one simple gesture of affection over the past few months has caused this pup to grow somewhat attached to me, albeit the demonstration of this affection is always brief. I think he recognizes the sound of my heels whenever I come back from my internship. When he hears me coming, he will run up to me to let me pet him. Although I don’t think he really knows how to play, he gets excited simply to have someone reach out and touch him.
In this same sense, I think that is much of the social problem with China. Not to say I am comparing the condition of a dog with the average Chinese, as that would be too rude, but the affliction is much the same. Since Chinese people are often so busy with their school or work lives, they do not have the time to settle down and just relax, interact with a setting other than a structured workplace. As a result, in spite of the company of 1.3 billion people, I find that they are often super lonely. They crave a relationship of some sort, whether romantic or friendship; it is just tragic. I think I need to remind myself that although I am often tired, the simplest gesture of just caring for someone makes a huge difference, especially in China. They will remember you. Whether it is having manners at a restaurant and saying “Thank you” to a waitress when she gives you something, or asking how someone is doing sincerely, I think that is the true way of demonstrating a bit of the kindness the Bible speaks of. Being a witness for the Lord does not mean you have to be in someone’s face about religion. No, it can simply mean showing that something is different about you, and for me personally, that difference is because of Jesus working in my life. We do not choose a religion to participate in it every so often. No, being Christian is your being; it is a lifestyle that needs to be put into practice every day. That is what it means to be Christian, and I need to continue to strive towards this refining of my character into the likeness of Christ.
With a population of 1.3 billion people, the ratio of babies to adults in China is something ridiculous like 1:5. It may sound like an exaggeration, but I honestly see Chinese babies everywhere, and they are simply adorable. I am squealing inside as I write this. My mother has often found my love of children so contradictory. I love kids, but do not want any of my own. Well, that is not entirely accurate, because I am very open to the idea of adoption, but I think it all depends on whether the Lord chooses to bless me with a husband in the future. Either way, it is not something I care to waste too many brain cells worrying about. The Lord provides abundantly, and at my current place in life, I enjoy goo-ga-ga-ing over all the adorable children in the lovely city of Nanjing.
Due to the really damp winters that Nanjing has, babies are often wrapped up to the point that they look like marshmallow penguins, so stuffed full of layers that their arms stick out perpendicular to their little bodies. For the occasional few children that actually walk themselves in the city, I have often found them waddling down the sidewalk with a grandmother trailing behind them. The thick layers inhibit free movement, and thus, it is so cute to watch as they struggle to balance themselves and walk down the street. I however, feel bad for these children though as the weather has begun to warm up. While their parents are down to 2 layers of clothing, these poor kids are red in the faces with still another 10 layers of clothing on. Regardless though, I adore the kids here in China. They are simply precious.
I guess I have always just had an eye to spot cuteness, because no matter where I am, I will spot the mother hoisting a child over her shoulder across the street. Kamla will always spin around like three times, as I point frantically at the cute baby, and she’s like, “how did you even notice that?” I guess I really am a magnet to babies.
But at the same time, I think I have a soft spot for all things cuddly, fuzzy, and cute. I spot tiny birds like no other, and dogs as if they were the most precious things in the world. In the community where I live, a neighbor across from our building had purchased a puppy a couple of months back. However, from what I have observed, Chinese do not enjoy physically petting their pets as much as we do. In fact, physical interaction or affection with their pets is slim to none. At first, the puppy was super hyper. The friendly creature it was, it would go greet everyone and say “hi!” I cannot resist puppy eyes on any creature, and pet him whenever I get the chance to. However, after a mild scolding from his owner one time, and probably some training of some sort, he was a little more hesitant to come and greet me. However, I still walk over to him and let him sniff me, so that I can pet him. This one simple gesture of affection over the past few months has caused this pup to grow somewhat attached to me, albeit the demonstration of this affection is always brief. I think he recognizes the sound of my heels whenever I come back from my internship. When he hears me coming, he will run up to me to let me pet him. Although I don’t think he really knows how to play, he gets excited simply to have someone reach out and touch him.
In this same sense, I think that is much of the social problem with China. Not to say I am comparing the condition of a dog with the average Chinese, as that would be too rude, but the affliction is much the same. Since Chinese people are often so busy with their school or work lives, they do not have the time to settle down and just relax, interact with a setting other than a structured workplace. As a result, in spite of the company of 1.3 billion people, I find that they are often super lonely. They crave a relationship of some sort, whether romantic or friendship; it is just tragic. I think I need to remind myself that although I am often tired, the simplest gesture of just caring for someone makes a huge difference, especially in China. They will remember you. Whether it is having manners at a restaurant and saying “Thank you” to a waitress when she gives you something, or asking how someone is doing sincerely, I think that is the true way of demonstrating a bit of the kindness the Bible speaks of. Being a witness for the Lord does not mean you have to be in someone’s face about religion. No, it can simply mean showing that something is different about you, and for me personally, that difference is because of Jesus working in my life. We do not choose a religion to participate in it every so often. No, being Christian is your being; it is a lifestyle that needs to be put into practice every day. That is what it means to be Christian, and I need to continue to strive towards this refining of my character into the likeness of Christ.
Friday, March 26, 2010
Planning Events, or Lack Thereof
In the short 5-6 months that I have been here in China, event planning is perhaps one of the worst aspects of the Chinese culture. It is virtually nonexistent, and this is made apparent in their transportation system. Train tickets can only be purchased a maximum of 10 days in advance (fairly recently reduced from the original 14); movie tickets can only be purchased for a movie only 24 hours in advance, any earlier and it is unavailable; plane tickets get cheaper as you draw closer to the departure date, etc. The list goes on, but planning, or lack thereof can essentially drive the planner/schedule-driven American insane. In my case, it has really done a number on my nerves.
While most of the times, I am appreciative of the generous gestures Kamla's family members have made, today was almost the last straw. Last night, Kamla's uncle "invited" us to attend a symphony this evening, which in the end, he personally did not attend either. I have been exhausted all week and have been craving a weekend off, a Friday night with which I could catch up on some much-needed house-keeping, cleaning, chores, and writing/thinking. I need an evening to myself that I can just lounge around and virtually do nothing, or be semi-productive in my own book would be perfect. But no, while the concert was fairly enjoyable minus the irritating concert-etiquette-lacking audience, there were moments where I wanted to close my eyes and enjoy the music, but nearly drifted off due to fatigue. And that is saying something. Music is a source of reprieve for me, but when combined with a commentating populace, children running amok in the aisles, and doors opening and closing, my patience wore thin. Granted, I truly appreciate Kamla's family, but sometimes, all I wish they would do is ask. Kamla is often too nice, and I don't think "no" is in her vocabulary. Perhaps I have traditionally been too quick to say "no" to many invitations, but sometimes I think we need to know our limits. So perhaps we ought to balance the two of us out, but I guess it's just a matter of principle.
As Americans, I think we often engage in fights, wars, arguments over a simple matter of principles. And with these surprise outings that are just dumped into my lap all of a sudden, I honestly could use a warning or two. It's just common decency to ask first, instead of forcing someone to go attend something. It is much like drinking in China, you don't just force people to drink, ask. I don't like it when my freedom of choice and decision-making abilities are ripped out from under me. It is not a feeling I enjoy, but I suppose it is something I ought to accustom myself to if I plan on working with people in China. Needless to say, it is something I am working on.
Thankfully the evening didn't go too late today, but the crazy side of me wanting to still accomplish some goals was cleaning the house at 2 a.m. Yes, it's silly of me to be mopping the floor, cleaning the bathroom at 2:00 a.m., but hey, it was mildly therapeutic, and I will not have to force a tired-me tomorrow to do it out of obligation. At least now, those simple chores are out of the way.
While most of the times, I am appreciative of the generous gestures Kamla's family members have made, today was almost the last straw. Last night, Kamla's uncle "invited" us to attend a symphony this evening, which in the end, he personally did not attend either. I have been exhausted all week and have been craving a weekend off, a Friday night with which I could catch up on some much-needed house-keeping, cleaning, chores, and writing/thinking. I need an evening to myself that I can just lounge around and virtually do nothing, or be semi-productive in my own book would be perfect. But no, while the concert was fairly enjoyable minus the irritating concert-etiquette-lacking audience, there were moments where I wanted to close my eyes and enjoy the music, but nearly drifted off due to fatigue. And that is saying something. Music is a source of reprieve for me, but when combined with a commentating populace, children running amok in the aisles, and doors opening and closing, my patience wore thin. Granted, I truly appreciate Kamla's family, but sometimes, all I wish they would do is ask. Kamla is often too nice, and I don't think "no" is in her vocabulary. Perhaps I have traditionally been too quick to say "no" to many invitations, but sometimes I think we need to know our limits. So perhaps we ought to balance the two of us out, but I guess it's just a matter of principle.
As Americans, I think we often engage in fights, wars, arguments over a simple matter of principles. And with these surprise outings that are just dumped into my lap all of a sudden, I honestly could use a warning or two. It's just common decency to ask first, instead of forcing someone to go attend something. It is much like drinking in China, you don't just force people to drink, ask. I don't like it when my freedom of choice and decision-making abilities are ripped out from under me. It is not a feeling I enjoy, but I suppose it is something I ought to accustom myself to if I plan on working with people in China. Needless to say, it is something I am working on.
Thankfully the evening didn't go too late today, but the crazy side of me wanting to still accomplish some goals was cleaning the house at 2 a.m. Yes, it's silly of me to be mopping the floor, cleaning the bathroom at 2:00 a.m., but hey, it was mildly therapeutic, and I will not have to force a tired-me tomorrow to do it out of obligation. At least now, those simple chores are out of the way.
Wednesday, March 17, 2010
Observations on the Law
As I have certainly iterated before, being a lawyer in China does not seem like legal counsel at all. Instead, it is often marriage counseling, or consoling the client for his or her losses. Yesterday, a coworker asked me what it was like to be a lawyer in the US. Did we have to deal with the same kind of “crap,” as it were, everyday? I certainly did not have an answer for him, but after the consultation that I was certain the entire firm heard yesterday, I am almost positive our system is entirely different.
A lady came in yesterday, I have no idea how old she was, but it was indeed a case of lamentation. I have a lot of trouble understanding incoherent Nanjing dialect babble, especially when someone is 激动, but this was definitely an experience. As soon as she sat on the couch in the receptionist area and was met up with the lawyer who usually sits next to me, she started yelling at him. I am positive it had nothing to do with him, but it was her way of explaining. As she yelled so loud like she was getting into a fight, her voice permeated the entire firm. The lawyer, on the other hand, remained calm and collected, simply staying quiet as she yelled her explanation at him. It is somewhat stunning for myself, because I do not see the effectiveness of yelling at your representative lawyer. I guess my impression of law is more laid out or systematic, where people come to lawyers to resolve their problems, that is after they have already calmed themselves and have a semi-level head to fix the problem. I think that’s why in the US, as far as I know, for divorces, they give you one year’s time before you can complete the divorce, giving you adequate time to think things out. Anyhow, as I tried to understand what this lady was lamenting about, all of a sudden, it went from yelling at the top of her lungs to wailing as she began to cry. From the sound of her voice, she was fairly older, and there was just so much pain at the injustice of what I could only assume was either her marriage or the situation she was in (likely a landlord, as that is all I have seen dealt here most frequently).
Indeed, it would seem like family law is a huge practice in China, and all these people are just so desperate for some kind of resolution to a marriage they personally are not willing to fix themselves. It is honestly rather sad to see this situation, but I believe it is in part due to the One-Child Policy. Since every child is spoiled to the point of being treated as little emperors and empresses, they are used to getting things their way, and do not let up no matter what. So when two spoiled individuals used to having their way are put together in a marriage, chaos can only ensue if one does not let up.
I think as a society, their family structures have been truly messed up. Not only will kids within the next few years not have any cousin of any sort (as is happening already to some), but because there is a trend to get married in China by a certain age, a lot of these marriages are not only premature but unstable. I find a lot of couples these days dating simply for the sake of saying that they are in a relationship. As it disturbs me that these couples are so publicly affectionate even in such a supposedly “conservative” society, I wonder at what the future will bring. These couples get married fairly fast, all marrying before the age of 30, and all have kids almost immediately after marriage. They do not have time to simply get to know each other nor do they understand the dynamics of being a couple, and delve into child-rearing, which only escalates problems. As a result, divorce rates are on a rise, and lawyers I suppose in this area are continuing to be in great need. It is tragic though that the mainland Chinese culture has fallen to such a point. In the past, divorce was seen as taboo, because family is central to the Chinese culture. But now, it is the selfish needs of the individual, be it personal liberties, sexual gratification, or professional aspirations that guide the society. I fear for the future. Hopefully the Chinese government has observed this and will find a means to curtail the issue. I was talking to Lauren, and she told me that in a recent poll, 70% of mainland Chinese do not like the One Child Policy. Whereas in other countries, the government will pay you to give birth and raise a child (as birthrates are slumping in other countries), China yearns to have such liberties. I just hope China can find a balance so that families are satisfied with themselves, and yet maintain just enough balance so that the government can sustain such a large population.
A lady came in yesterday, I have no idea how old she was, but it was indeed a case of lamentation. I have a lot of trouble understanding incoherent Nanjing dialect babble, especially when someone is 激动, but this was definitely an experience. As soon as she sat on the couch in the receptionist area and was met up with the lawyer who usually sits next to me, she started yelling at him. I am positive it had nothing to do with him, but it was her way of explaining. As she yelled so loud like she was getting into a fight, her voice permeated the entire firm. The lawyer, on the other hand, remained calm and collected, simply staying quiet as she yelled her explanation at him. It is somewhat stunning for myself, because I do not see the effectiveness of yelling at your representative lawyer. I guess my impression of law is more laid out or systematic, where people come to lawyers to resolve their problems, that is after they have already calmed themselves and have a semi-level head to fix the problem. I think that’s why in the US, as far as I know, for divorces, they give you one year’s time before you can complete the divorce, giving you adequate time to think things out. Anyhow, as I tried to understand what this lady was lamenting about, all of a sudden, it went from yelling at the top of her lungs to wailing as she began to cry. From the sound of her voice, she was fairly older, and there was just so much pain at the injustice of what I could only assume was either her marriage or the situation she was in (likely a landlord, as that is all I have seen dealt here most frequently).
Indeed, it would seem like family law is a huge practice in China, and all these people are just so desperate for some kind of resolution to a marriage they personally are not willing to fix themselves. It is honestly rather sad to see this situation, but I believe it is in part due to the One-Child Policy. Since every child is spoiled to the point of being treated as little emperors and empresses, they are used to getting things their way, and do not let up no matter what. So when two spoiled individuals used to having their way are put together in a marriage, chaos can only ensue if one does not let up.
I think as a society, their family structures have been truly messed up. Not only will kids within the next few years not have any cousin of any sort (as is happening already to some), but because there is a trend to get married in China by a certain age, a lot of these marriages are not only premature but unstable. I find a lot of couples these days dating simply for the sake of saying that they are in a relationship. As it disturbs me that these couples are so publicly affectionate even in such a supposedly “conservative” society, I wonder at what the future will bring. These couples get married fairly fast, all marrying before the age of 30, and all have kids almost immediately after marriage. They do not have time to simply get to know each other nor do they understand the dynamics of being a couple, and delve into child-rearing, which only escalates problems. As a result, divorce rates are on a rise, and lawyers I suppose in this area are continuing to be in great need. It is tragic though that the mainland Chinese culture has fallen to such a point. In the past, divorce was seen as taboo, because family is central to the Chinese culture. But now, it is the selfish needs of the individual, be it personal liberties, sexual gratification, or professional aspirations that guide the society. I fear for the future. Hopefully the Chinese government has observed this and will find a means to curtail the issue. I was talking to Lauren, and she told me that in a recent poll, 70% of mainland Chinese do not like the One Child Policy. Whereas in other countries, the government will pay you to give birth and raise a child (as birthrates are slumping in other countries), China yearns to have such liberties. I just hope China can find a balance so that families are satisfied with themselves, and yet maintain just enough balance so that the government can sustain such a large population.
Cultural Observations
03.15.2010
不文明现象
There are somethings that still have that major shock factor whenever I browse/walk the streets of China. For example, people throwing bones on the streets or draining things into the city street drains (this can range from food excess to pure oil). It is rather disturbing at times, when I watch a seemingly decent lady sitting inside her store at lunch time, when suddenly she flings a chicken bone right in front of my feet as I walk by. This is definitely not what happens in civilized society; however, I think a part of this isn’t so much cultural as it is city layout. Granted, throwing any garbage into the streets is a depiction of uneducated society, but perhaps if the city had a better structure, sewage or even a better layout, more updated technology, they would have a better means to处理 the excess. Then, perhaps they would not use such unsanitary means of disposing their garbage (better drainage systems/garbage disposal in the sink).
Old people 体操by my law firm
One interesting sight I have found is that there are a bunch of elderly individuals who come in front of our building lately and simply just dance or do Tai Chi. It is rather amusing in the morning, when I find so many elderly individuals riding the bus specifically just to get to that area at 9:00 a.m. or 8:00 a.m. to practice. It’s rather cute.
Bus Riding
I am constantly sliding around on the bus like there is no tomorrow, and I have found that the floor in general is precarious to those without traction on their shoes. The reason being is that the floor is SOOO dirty with sandy mud that I slip all over the place with my 1 inch heels.
Car accident
There was a car accident today, and I was rather surprised by how they handled the situation. It was between a lady in a red Mazda and a man in a taxi. The lady took pictures of the accident, but they were both very anxious about the situation. While they handled it fairly effectively in terms of normal American traffic laws, they refused to move to the side of the street to resolve their dispute (as would be the logical and polite thing to do). Instead, they created a traffic jam as both cars refused to move until the transaction was settled between the two of them. Surprisingly, other cars simply just moved around them and there was no yelling or frustration with such an inefficient way of coping with the situation. I myself, rather, stood on the side, practically screaming at them in my head for them to just move to the side of the road and stop blocking traffic (and I was merely standing at the bus stop). This perhaps reflects though the value that they place in cars. Since they all spend more than they can afford on cars of luxury for “face,” even the littlest scratch will not be let go, and they will indefinitely seek compensation.
不文明现象
There are somethings that still have that major shock factor whenever I browse/walk the streets of China. For example, people throwing bones on the streets or draining things into the city street drains (this can range from food excess to pure oil). It is rather disturbing at times, when I watch a seemingly decent lady sitting inside her store at lunch time, when suddenly she flings a chicken bone right in front of my feet as I walk by. This is definitely not what happens in civilized society; however, I think a part of this isn’t so much cultural as it is city layout. Granted, throwing any garbage into the streets is a depiction of uneducated society, but perhaps if the city had a better structure, sewage or even a better layout, more updated technology, they would have a better means to处理 the excess. Then, perhaps they would not use such unsanitary means of disposing their garbage (better drainage systems/garbage disposal in the sink).
Old people 体操by my law firm
One interesting sight I have found is that there are a bunch of elderly individuals who come in front of our building lately and simply just dance or do Tai Chi. It is rather amusing in the morning, when I find so many elderly individuals riding the bus specifically just to get to that area at 9:00 a.m. or 8:00 a.m. to practice. It’s rather cute.
Bus Riding
I am constantly sliding around on the bus like there is no tomorrow, and I have found that the floor in general is precarious to those without traction on their shoes. The reason being is that the floor is SOOO dirty with sandy mud that I slip all over the place with my 1 inch heels.
Car accident
There was a car accident today, and I was rather surprised by how they handled the situation. It was between a lady in a red Mazda and a man in a taxi. The lady took pictures of the accident, but they were both very anxious about the situation. While they handled it fairly effectively in terms of normal American traffic laws, they refused to move to the side of the street to resolve their dispute (as would be the logical and polite thing to do). Instead, they created a traffic jam as both cars refused to move until the transaction was settled between the two of them. Surprisingly, other cars simply just moved around them and there was no yelling or frustration with such an inefficient way of coping with the situation. I myself, rather, stood on the side, practically screaming at them in my head for them to just move to the side of the road and stop blocking traffic (and I was merely standing at the bus stop). This perhaps reflects though the value that they place in cars. Since they all spend more than they can afford on cars of luxury for “face,” even the littlest scratch will not be let go, and they will indefinitely seek compensation.
Nothing says Supsicious like an American Passport
Contrary to what China Daily will have you believe, Sino-American relations are not as fine and dandy as they make it out to be. My boss today in passing asked me what forms of Chinese identification did I have. I had none, other than my own passport and the Chinese visa inside it. He had wanted to bring me to the court house, but was afraid that there would be complications if all I had was an American passport. Attorney Shi had informed me that in the past, American passports have proven tricky to get into a normal courthouse.
I think China remains suspicious of Americans, and don't want any of us anywhere near places of power, fearing that we might influence the general populace. In Connie's case, her initial internship plan with the local newspaper flopped because she had an American passport. And now, it is me and entering a government facility that metes law. What kind of "good" relationship is that if you suspect that Americans will mess up the current system in place? I grow tired of this suspicion towards us. Just because I have my differing opinions does not mean that I will necessarily impose them on you. It is frustrating, and something the general populace ought to take into consideration before trying to impose their own social philosophies on me... I am not planning on converting to communism any time soon. I am attached to the democracy and freedom I enjoy.
I think China remains suspicious of Americans, and don't want any of us anywhere near places of power, fearing that we might influence the general populace. In Connie's case, her initial internship plan with the local newspaper flopped because she had an American passport. And now, it is me and entering a government facility that metes law. What kind of "good" relationship is that if you suspect that Americans will mess up the current system in place? I grow tired of this suspicion towards us. Just because I have my differing opinions does not mean that I will necessarily impose them on you. It is frustrating, and something the general populace ought to take into consideration before trying to impose their own social philosophies on me... I am not planning on converting to communism any time soon. I am attached to the democracy and freedom I enjoy.
Blind Side
Blind Side is a remarkable film, and I was stunned by some of the underlying themes. As usual, my pensive side got the best of me, and the brilliant movie really got me thinking.
At the young age of 23, Michael Oher, since 2009 signed to the Ravens in the NFL was once mistreated and looked down on in a high-class, Anglo-Saxon, Southern community. As I watched the film indicate some prejudices that still remain to this day, these issues shocked me as they occurred merely 5-6 years ago. Indeed, racism remains an issue to this day, but it still shocks me that there are still communities with such extreme prejudices and stereotypes towards others of a different color. Indeed, being slightly lighter on the "color" spectrum and further up north has indeed blessed me without such painful experiences, but when I think back on it now, I think racism still happens in some form around us. Granted, I have never been called something as demeaning as "chink," but "that short Asian girl" can sometimes hit a nerve when you want to be seen as more than that. Growing up in the Northwest was indeed a blessing, as I did not face many racist notions from the community, but indeed, I think I stuck out like a sore thumb back in preschool, being 1 of only 2 Chinese girls. I think as children, we are not aware of this concept of "race" or "color." It is a social construct that is drilled into us through our education. Whether it is a conscious action or unconscious on our government's part (such as surveys and censuses), in some ways, being in such a diverse society as America can have its ups and downs.
Diversity is something we emphasize as a nation, but at the same time, because of it, we often draw lines of division to specify what that diversity is. I recall commercials at a young age where they flashed through people of different races saying "I am American." While it may be heartwarming, this is often not the case. In no way am I perceived as the "true" American. Even though I am as American as you can get, born, raised, educated in America, I will always never be purely identified as such. I will always have an attachment to the title, a hyphenation as American-Chinese or Chinese-American, whichever you will. And yes, while I find immense pride in being Chinese by ethnicity, my nationality is indeed American, but I will never be recognized that way, whether by my own government or by others. It is a frustrating paradox. I do not think that the typical WASP (White Anglo Saxon Protestant) faces this issue. They never have to identify themselves as, "I am American-British-Irish-Native American-Russian-German" or vice versa. They simply say "I am American," and as a global society, we have accepted that. Sometimes I just find it a painful realization.
Kamla today had an awkward question from a taxi driver, saying "If the US and China were to go to war, which side would you pick?" I'll give her props for having the guts to answer this can of worms honestly, as I typically avoid these questions with a simple "It's too complicated." No, instead, she said, "I'd pick America, because I was raised there and identify with them more." However, interestingly enough, the driver said, "But, you know deep down inside,you're really Chinese right?" Sometimes it's more a statement than a question, but it's frustrating. Could I ever truly break into this market or this society? Would they trust me more simply because I am Chinese by descent? Or would I be seen as a potential threat, never truly able to discern where my loyalties lie? It is indeed a complicated dilemma and somewhat why I am beginning to shy away from the idea of a permanent vocation in mainland China.
Anyhow, back to the movie Blind Side. As my eyes teared up at this one particularly emotional scene, I realized how much I take for granted. Michael Oher's later adoptive mother had brought him into her home and decided to give him a guest room to permanently stay in. As she lists off all the things that are now his and that he can use, she stops and smiles at his amazement. "What, you've never had your own room before?" In a sobering moment, Michael replies, "No, I've never had my own bed before." As her eyes began to tear, she quickly muttered, "Well, you do now," and briskly walked into the solace of her own room to cry. I found myself instantly crying with her as I realized how many things in life I took for granted. This is not some third world country we're talking about. This is modern America, a man who is merely 3 years my senior five years ago did not ever have his own bed. I realized in that moment that I am not only blessed, but have indulged too much in luxury. I expect to live in the lap of luxury, I expect comfort, and yet, some people can barely get by. Granted, I doubt that this will instantaneously curb any of my luxurious tastes, but I will indeed reconsider my shopping habits and get back into being a better steward of my money. It's just been spend, spend, spend.
Lastly, the theme of family in the movie made me miss my own family deeply. I miss the family dynamics that seems so lacking here in China. Since many family structures have a reversed focus, with 2 generations of people focusing all their attention on the only child, I miss a family that is willing to give up so much for their fellow brother, sister, mother, or father. At the same time, I think I have come to understand a bit more about parenting. Michael Oher's birth mother was a cocaine addict, and although he was in the throes of it all, his mother would always tell him to close his eyes so that he would never see her use a needle or the bad things she was engaged in. I think that's what's amazing about any parent. While a "parent" is a loose term, I think no parent ever wants their child (no matter how emotionally distant) to get involved in the same wrongs or mistakes that they have done in the past. Now, I begin to become more grateful for all the things my parents have done. While it may be annoying at times to hear their nagging, I know that it comes from a good place, and that they are simply trying to get me to understand, help me avoid the mistakes of their own pasts. Of course, nothing teaches much like a lesson of experience, and I am and have always been a glutton for punishment, but I think I'm beginning to see that my parents know best. They are after all much older and much wiser than I am. The more experiences I have, the more I realize how little I know both about life and about the world. Therefore, if I were smart, I should definitely listen to the advice of the generation before me.
At the young age of 23, Michael Oher, since 2009 signed to the Ravens in the NFL was once mistreated and looked down on in a high-class, Anglo-Saxon, Southern community. As I watched the film indicate some prejudices that still remain to this day, these issues shocked me as they occurred merely 5-6 years ago. Indeed, racism remains an issue to this day, but it still shocks me that there are still communities with such extreme prejudices and stereotypes towards others of a different color. Indeed, being slightly lighter on the "color" spectrum and further up north has indeed blessed me without such painful experiences, but when I think back on it now, I think racism still happens in some form around us. Granted, I have never been called something as demeaning as "chink," but "that short Asian girl" can sometimes hit a nerve when you want to be seen as more than that. Growing up in the Northwest was indeed a blessing, as I did not face many racist notions from the community, but indeed, I think I stuck out like a sore thumb back in preschool, being 1 of only 2 Chinese girls. I think as children, we are not aware of this concept of "race" or "color." It is a social construct that is drilled into us through our education. Whether it is a conscious action or unconscious on our government's part (such as surveys and censuses), in some ways, being in such a diverse society as America can have its ups and downs.
Diversity is something we emphasize as a nation, but at the same time, because of it, we often draw lines of division to specify what that diversity is. I recall commercials at a young age where they flashed through people of different races saying "I am American." While it may be heartwarming, this is often not the case. In no way am I perceived as the "true" American. Even though I am as American as you can get, born, raised, educated in America, I will always never be purely identified as such. I will always have an attachment to the title, a hyphenation as American-Chinese or Chinese-American, whichever you will. And yes, while I find immense pride in being Chinese by ethnicity, my nationality is indeed American, but I will never be recognized that way, whether by my own government or by others. It is a frustrating paradox. I do not think that the typical WASP (White Anglo Saxon Protestant) faces this issue. They never have to identify themselves as, "I am American-British-Irish-Native American-Russian-German" or vice versa. They simply say "I am American," and as a global society, we have accepted that. Sometimes I just find it a painful realization.
Kamla today had an awkward question from a taxi driver, saying "If the US and China were to go to war, which side would you pick?" I'll give her props for having the guts to answer this can of worms honestly, as I typically avoid these questions with a simple "It's too complicated." No, instead, she said, "I'd pick America, because I was raised there and identify with them more." However, interestingly enough, the driver said, "But, you know deep down inside,you're really Chinese right?" Sometimes it's more a statement than a question, but it's frustrating. Could I ever truly break into this market or this society? Would they trust me more simply because I am Chinese by descent? Or would I be seen as a potential threat, never truly able to discern where my loyalties lie? It is indeed a complicated dilemma and somewhat why I am beginning to shy away from the idea of a permanent vocation in mainland China.
Anyhow, back to the movie Blind Side. As my eyes teared up at this one particularly emotional scene, I realized how much I take for granted. Michael Oher's later adoptive mother had brought him into her home and decided to give him a guest room to permanently stay in. As she lists off all the things that are now his and that he can use, she stops and smiles at his amazement. "What, you've never had your own room before?" In a sobering moment, Michael replies, "No, I've never had my own bed before." As her eyes began to tear, she quickly muttered, "Well, you do now," and briskly walked into the solace of her own room to cry. I found myself instantly crying with her as I realized how many things in life I took for granted. This is not some third world country we're talking about. This is modern America, a man who is merely 3 years my senior five years ago did not ever have his own bed. I realized in that moment that I am not only blessed, but have indulged too much in luxury. I expect to live in the lap of luxury, I expect comfort, and yet, some people can barely get by. Granted, I doubt that this will instantaneously curb any of my luxurious tastes, but I will indeed reconsider my shopping habits and get back into being a better steward of my money. It's just been spend, spend, spend.
Lastly, the theme of family in the movie made me miss my own family deeply. I miss the family dynamics that seems so lacking here in China. Since many family structures have a reversed focus, with 2 generations of people focusing all their attention on the only child, I miss a family that is willing to give up so much for their fellow brother, sister, mother, or father. At the same time, I think I have come to understand a bit more about parenting. Michael Oher's birth mother was a cocaine addict, and although he was in the throes of it all, his mother would always tell him to close his eyes so that he would never see her use a needle or the bad things she was engaged in. I think that's what's amazing about any parent. While a "parent" is a loose term, I think no parent ever wants their child (no matter how emotionally distant) to get involved in the same wrongs or mistakes that they have done in the past. Now, I begin to become more grateful for all the things my parents have done. While it may be annoying at times to hear their nagging, I know that it comes from a good place, and that they are simply trying to get me to understand, help me avoid the mistakes of their own pasts. Of course, nothing teaches much like a lesson of experience, and I am and have always been a glutton for punishment, but I think I'm beginning to see that my parents know best. They are after all much older and much wiser than I am. The more experiences I have, the more I realize how little I know both about life and about the world. Therefore, if I were smart, I should definitely listen to the advice of the generation before me.
Wednesday, March 10, 2010
Observations about the Workplace
One of the things that I have noticed about the Chinese workforce, whether culturally or simply system-wise, is that people are uncomfortable by themselves. Unlike the U.S., where cubicle spaces are seen as the lowest of the low, I found that a majority of Chinese people seem uncomfortable with the idea of being left alone by themselves. While indeed, people of high positions get their own offices, or at the very least share it with one other individual, there is always a mild comfort in the company of another person. Since the original water cooler must be cleaned on a monthly basis (as it grows this weird algae), as an office, they unanimously decided to simply use a water kettle instead. The legal staff, however, takes this as an opportunity to enter the “cubicle” area, where they refill their cups with water and then engage in conversation. The conversation is never anything surprising, the usual talk of the weather or asking about a case, or simply questions about their families’ welfare, but I always find it interesting that they would go out of their ways to do this.
Indeed, I believe this is in large part the reason why a lot of interns have little to do, at least in a law firm. The traditional photo copies and refilling of coffee responsibilities for the intern have been of no demand or little use, as it would take away from the little social interaction that these individuals have with one another. Instead, it is an excuse to walk around, move their legs, communicate with one another, and have something to do in the office other than work all day.
The work efficiency of the average Chinese is surprisingly rather low. I mean, indeed, some people do not care at all, but the overall business in itself does not demand much from them. While I always feel like there is overstaffing in any company, store, or firm, I think this is in large part due to the population size. The government needs to find a way of keeping these people employed, but as a result, the tasks have been divvied up in such a manner that each individual in reality has very little to do. Unfortunately, this system only creates clutter and limits the total efficiency of their workforce.
For example, I went to a skincare franchise called “It’s Skin,” and the store was probably only about the size of my bedroom. However, the store itself was empty of customers, but had 7 employees at its disposal. As soon as you walk in, half of them flock around you, because there is so little to do. As soon as we left though, I discovered that most of these employees turned back around and returned to trying out the sample products on display intended for customers. From a business perspective, I would not hire that many useless people. But in China, wages are so cheap, and in the Chinese mindset, the more the merrier. It is not a matter of efficiency, but the demands of the market as well as the Chinese culture of “face.” It definitely sounds better to say that I have ten employees as opposed to having only three in your store, even though the ten work about the same as three people.
I suppose in this sense, most of us, at least American interns, feel pretty useless. For me, I feel completely useless most of the time, because I am not even given clerical work to busy myself with the time. On occasion, there is some, but the firm is so over-employed at times, that even the clerical work is snatched up so that they are not bored out of their minds. The lawyer’s desk that I sat in came in yesterday, but had absolutely nothing to do. Without a computer on his desk, he merely read the newspaper and walked around the office to talk to people. Since it was his “down time” per se from cases, his lack of a task merely meant show up to the office for about an hour, and deeming it pointless, he left early at about 2:00 p.m. I suppose this is simply with law firms, as I have yet to hear this kind of freedom to leave work whenever you want from other jobs. I guess it just goes with the territory. The more you put in to achieve the license to practice, the less you will have to work as a result of that initial effort.
Indeed, I believe this is in large part the reason why a lot of interns have little to do, at least in a law firm. The traditional photo copies and refilling of coffee responsibilities for the intern have been of no demand or little use, as it would take away from the little social interaction that these individuals have with one another. Instead, it is an excuse to walk around, move their legs, communicate with one another, and have something to do in the office other than work all day.
The work efficiency of the average Chinese is surprisingly rather low. I mean, indeed, some people do not care at all, but the overall business in itself does not demand much from them. While I always feel like there is overstaffing in any company, store, or firm, I think this is in large part due to the population size. The government needs to find a way of keeping these people employed, but as a result, the tasks have been divvied up in such a manner that each individual in reality has very little to do. Unfortunately, this system only creates clutter and limits the total efficiency of their workforce.
For example, I went to a skincare franchise called “It’s Skin,” and the store was probably only about the size of my bedroom. However, the store itself was empty of customers, but had 7 employees at its disposal. As soon as you walk in, half of them flock around you, because there is so little to do. As soon as we left though, I discovered that most of these employees turned back around and returned to trying out the sample products on display intended for customers. From a business perspective, I would not hire that many useless people. But in China, wages are so cheap, and in the Chinese mindset, the more the merrier. It is not a matter of efficiency, but the demands of the market as well as the Chinese culture of “face.” It definitely sounds better to say that I have ten employees as opposed to having only three in your store, even though the ten work about the same as three people.
I suppose in this sense, most of us, at least American interns, feel pretty useless. For me, I feel completely useless most of the time, because I am not even given clerical work to busy myself with the time. On occasion, there is some, but the firm is so over-employed at times, that even the clerical work is snatched up so that they are not bored out of their minds. The lawyer’s desk that I sat in came in yesterday, but had absolutely nothing to do. Without a computer on his desk, he merely read the newspaper and walked around the office to talk to people. Since it was his “down time” per se from cases, his lack of a task merely meant show up to the office for about an hour, and deeming it pointless, he left early at about 2:00 p.m. I suppose this is simply with law firms, as I have yet to hear this kind of freedom to leave work whenever you want from other jobs. I guess it just goes with the territory. The more you put in to achieve the license to practice, the less you will have to work as a result of that initial effort.
Thursday, March 4, 2010
Feeling Guilty
In the good 6 months that I have been in China, never have I felt so compelled to return home immediately. Today, as I conversed with my younger sister over Skype, I was disturbed by the fact that I was completely oblivious to the fact that someone (who I shall leave unnamed) was not only insulting my father, but being condescending to him. It took all the strength I could muster to keep the tears brimming in my eyes from falling.
As I write this now, I am overwhelmed with emotion; I am wracked with guilt at not being able to defend my defenseless father, and yet in that guilt, I am also touched by my father's spiritual maturity. I feel guilty that I was not able to help more. While my father was being 侮辱ed (insulted), I was dilly-dallying my days away. While my father stressed over wording things in English and getting things figured out, I was thousands of miles across an ocean, unable to help. I think it was my sheer obliviousness to the matter and the fact that I did so little, that I may have actually contributed to the conflict happening that bothers me so much. For the first time, in this very moment, I wish I was back home so that I could have done something to help him.
But too much too late, and my guilt does little good. I have a mind to throw some colorful language at this individual that insulted my father so rudely, but that would be unprofessional and un-Christian-like. No, instead, the part where I am touched is the manner in which my father responded to this situation. I think my ire in this situation reveals my lack of maturity. I am too quick to speak, and too quick to anger, when the Bible (James) advises me to be slow to both. I am too quick to throw back insults at those that wrong me, when the Bible (I Peter) encourages me to bless those that seek to hurt me. I struggle and am still struggling with this, especially every morning when I cross the precarious road traffic in China. By some miracle I am alive after each extrication. But anyhow, instead of hurling back like-toned language, my father responded with sincerity. This individual had thrown out a completely "ridiculous" proposal, thinking no one would ever go for a deal like that, as it would not benefit my father. However, my father, thinking only of the client, accepted the offer, and I think it was this sincerity that touched even the individual that insulted my father.
This is what it means to witness to unbelievers through your life and actions, and not just words. I am very proud of my father for having such spiritual maturity in the way he handled this matter. I would've had some choice words for the individual, but no, I am very impressed by my father, and have much to learn from him. I have been extremely blessed by my Heavenly Father with such a wonderful earthly Father. I think with time, I have come to realize how little I know and how immature I truly am. All that people see as maturity is merely a facade, standards of which are wordly and not heavenly. I have much to learn.
As I write this now, I am overwhelmed with emotion; I am wracked with guilt at not being able to defend my defenseless father, and yet in that guilt, I am also touched by my father's spiritual maturity. I feel guilty that I was not able to help more. While my father was being 侮辱ed (insulted), I was dilly-dallying my days away. While my father stressed over wording things in English and getting things figured out, I was thousands of miles across an ocean, unable to help. I think it was my sheer obliviousness to the matter and the fact that I did so little, that I may have actually contributed to the conflict happening that bothers me so much. For the first time, in this very moment, I wish I was back home so that I could have done something to help him.
But too much too late, and my guilt does little good. I have a mind to throw some colorful language at this individual that insulted my father so rudely, but that would be unprofessional and un-Christian-like. No, instead, the part where I am touched is the manner in which my father responded to this situation. I think my ire in this situation reveals my lack of maturity. I am too quick to speak, and too quick to anger, when the Bible (James) advises me to be slow to both. I am too quick to throw back insults at those that wrong me, when the Bible (I Peter) encourages me to bless those that seek to hurt me. I struggle and am still struggling with this, especially every morning when I cross the precarious road traffic in China. By some miracle I am alive after each extrication. But anyhow, instead of hurling back like-toned language, my father responded with sincerity. This individual had thrown out a completely "ridiculous" proposal, thinking no one would ever go for a deal like that, as it would not benefit my father. However, my father, thinking only of the client, accepted the offer, and I think it was this sincerity that touched even the individual that insulted my father.
This is what it means to witness to unbelievers through your life and actions, and not just words. I am very proud of my father for having such spiritual maturity in the way he handled this matter. I would've had some choice words for the individual, but no, I am very impressed by my father, and have much to learn from him. I have been extremely blessed by my Heavenly Father with such a wonderful earthly Father. I think with time, I have come to realize how little I know and how immature I truly am. All that people see as maturity is merely a facade, standards of which are wordly and not heavenly. I have much to learn.
The Chinese Lawyer turned Marital Counselor
You would think that lawyers in general have a high status in modern society, but in China, sometimes it feels like they've been reduced to marital counselor, or at least a coach of some sort.
Half the time, I hear these calls to the legal staff's cell phones that go something like this: "Hello? How can I help you? No, no you can't sue your husband for that. His actions aren't liable for such a high offense, but you can bring this up with the police and file a report instead. No, no that will not get you any money. You want a divorce? Well, you'd still have to file this report first to establish that there is a problem. No, ma'am, *sigh*, here's what the law is about this..."
It's like these people have so many relationship issues, and when they don't know how to solve it, they say, "I want a divorce!" and take it up with a lawyer. Half the time, it's this whole, back and forth thing, "No, I don't want to talk to him. You tell him for me." "But ma'am, I can't do that as your lawyer. I would be compromising the integrity of the case. No, you will need to find someone else to accompany you as a witness." I feel bad for these lawyers. I mean, they spend so many years invested into studying the legal system, and probably have the greatest understanding of the law and have the greatest burden for justice, but all this becomes jaded as they are reduced to solving issues for people who neither care for justice nor understand the law. It's a tough situation, so I must say I admire their patience.
Half the time, I hear these calls to the legal staff's cell phones that go something like this: "Hello? How can I help you? No, no you can't sue your husband for that. His actions aren't liable for such a high offense, but you can bring this up with the police and file a report instead. No, no that will not get you any money. You want a divorce? Well, you'd still have to file this report first to establish that there is a problem. No, ma'am, *sigh*, here's what the law is about this..."
It's like these people have so many relationship issues, and when they don't know how to solve it, they say, "I want a divorce!" and take it up with a lawyer. Half the time, it's this whole, back and forth thing, "No, I don't want to talk to him. You tell him for me." "But ma'am, I can't do that as your lawyer. I would be compromising the integrity of the case. No, you will need to find someone else to accompany you as a witness." I feel bad for these lawyers. I mean, they spend so many years invested into studying the legal system, and probably have the greatest understanding of the law and have the greatest burden for justice, but all this becomes jaded as they are reduced to solving issues for people who neither care for justice nor understand the law. It's a tough situation, so I must say I admire their patience.
Noise Complaint
I must say that living with Kamla has brought me a lot of rare experiences. *laughs* There are always those situations that leave you feeling embarrassed and slightly indignant to mask that sudden flush in the cheeks, and today was just one of them.
I am reminded of the large population in China, the limited living space, and oh yes, paper-thin walls, I kid you not. Today, as Kamla was practicing her erhu after dinner, she was a good 10-15 minutes in, when I suddenly I heard the doorbell. My hearing may not be as good as it used to, but I can still pick up things like that. Our neighbor, kind soul that she is, gently asked us to stop playing the erhu and to be more quiet in the hallway when we leave. I apologized, feeling embarrassed, but not before feeling highly indignant. I had never complained about all the noise that came from their side of the house, and for crying out loud, it was only 9:10 p.m.
Granted with more level-headed thinking, many thanks to Kamla, I came to realize that it probably wasn't her fault. I could understand that she has a young girl who has school tomorrow, so is probably trying to go to bed at 9:00. We found it comical after thinking about it, that her daughter likely complained about the awful noise coming through the walls. Although the other likely half is that her husband was too irritated, wanted to rest in peace and quiet after a long day's work, and told his wife to shut the weird American neighbors up. Granted she was nice, but I still felt somewhat indignant until calming down some from feeling riled up.
I mean, I never complained about hearing her husband's snoring through the walls for the past 5-6 months. It's not like I could say, "Hi neighbor, I know it may seem like a bother, but could you ask your husband to stop snoring? I can hear him through the walls, and I can't fall sleep at night." Granted, there were quite a few nights where my brain stayed wide awake due to the constant reminder that I couldn't fall asleep yet, but my neighbor already was. I haven't mentioned a thing when I hear, "Thump, thump, thump, I scored!" as she and her daughter played indoor soccer between their kitchen and their living room. I never said anything about the intense argument I heard that was sure to end in domestic violence or a divorce (much crying and yelling). So I guess I was mildly irked by the fact that they were the first to make a noise complaint when I have kept quiet. However, I think overall, there is only one thing that I have come to the conclusion of: China needs soundproof walls. ;p
I am reminded of the large population in China, the limited living space, and oh yes, paper-thin walls, I kid you not. Today, as Kamla was practicing her erhu after dinner, she was a good 10-15 minutes in, when I suddenly I heard the doorbell. My hearing may not be as good as it used to, but I can still pick up things like that. Our neighbor, kind soul that she is, gently asked us to stop playing the erhu and to be more quiet in the hallway when we leave. I apologized, feeling embarrassed, but not before feeling highly indignant. I had never complained about all the noise that came from their side of the house, and for crying out loud, it was only 9:10 p.m.
Granted with more level-headed thinking, many thanks to Kamla, I came to realize that it probably wasn't her fault. I could understand that she has a young girl who has school tomorrow, so is probably trying to go to bed at 9:00. We found it comical after thinking about it, that her daughter likely complained about the awful noise coming through the walls. Although the other likely half is that her husband was too irritated, wanted to rest in peace and quiet after a long day's work, and told his wife to shut the weird American neighbors up. Granted she was nice, but I still felt somewhat indignant until calming down some from feeling riled up.
I mean, I never complained about hearing her husband's snoring through the walls for the past 5-6 months. It's not like I could say, "Hi neighbor, I know it may seem like a bother, but could you ask your husband to stop snoring? I can hear him through the walls, and I can't fall sleep at night." Granted, there were quite a few nights where my brain stayed wide awake due to the constant reminder that I couldn't fall asleep yet, but my neighbor already was. I haven't mentioned a thing when I hear, "Thump, thump, thump, I scored!" as she and her daughter played indoor soccer between their kitchen and their living room. I never said anything about the intense argument I heard that was sure to end in domestic violence or a divorce (much crying and yelling). So I guess I was mildly irked by the fact that they were the first to make a noise complaint when I have kept quiet. However, I think overall, there is only one thing that I have come to the conclusion of: China needs soundproof walls. ;p
Sunday, February 28, 2010
Generation Gap
In China, they say a generation gap occurs every 4 years. When I first heard this, I found it preposterous. I have always been friends with people 4 years my senior or 4 years my junior (more my senior than junior, but you get the idea), and even with people who have a whole decade between us, I still get along just fine with them.
However, I think it finally began to dawn on me why age groups are so clique-like in Asian countries. On Friday, I met a girl, who was merely 2 years my younger, the same as my sister's age, and yet, I felt like we were YEARS apart, as in generations apart. I guess what they say about 90后 and 80后 is true, they have a difficult time associating with one another. It wasn't that I didn't like her, nor that we didn't get along, it was that I had a hard time relating to her, or at least tolerating some of her actions.
Indeed, this probably has to do with her upbringing to a certain degree, as she was very independent and handled things her way, but I think what stood out was the level of maturity. For my sister and I, we are the bestest of best friends, and I don't see a generation gap other than the fact that I have merely experienced some things in life earlier than she did. However, this is probably because my sister is also very mature for her age, but when comparing the two, they were worlds apart. I can see now why people who are merely a year or two apart may have some difficulty getting along in Asia.
I think whenever people meet me in China, they are always surprised to find out my real age. They are shocked that I am so young. When they associate with me, most often, they cannot tell that I am perhaps 3-4 years their junior (that is if I don't act goofy or silly). They always assume that I am one of them as I have no trouble talking with them or understanding/sympathizing with many of the things they go through. This is definitely a cultural difference that has been rather startling of a revelation for me. I always thought it ridiculous to say that 4 years is a generation gap (I commonly think of it as 10), but when people in China have such giant gaps in maturity level, I can see why this saying has come about in such a gigantic population. There really isn't a need to associate with people your senior or junior, because there are plenty of people within your class to be friends with who are at the same level and on par with you. It is definitely an interesting dilemma, one of which I am not too sure I am fond of.
However, I think it finally began to dawn on me why age groups are so clique-like in Asian countries. On Friday, I met a girl, who was merely 2 years my younger, the same as my sister's age, and yet, I felt like we were YEARS apart, as in generations apart. I guess what they say about 90后 and 80后 is true, they have a difficult time associating with one another. It wasn't that I didn't like her, nor that we didn't get along, it was that I had a hard time relating to her, or at least tolerating some of her actions.
Indeed, this probably has to do with her upbringing to a certain degree, as she was very independent and handled things her way, but I think what stood out was the level of maturity. For my sister and I, we are the bestest of best friends, and I don't see a generation gap other than the fact that I have merely experienced some things in life earlier than she did. However, this is probably because my sister is also very mature for her age, but when comparing the two, they were worlds apart. I can see now why people who are merely a year or two apart may have some difficulty getting along in Asia.
I think whenever people meet me in China, they are always surprised to find out my real age. They are shocked that I am so young. When they associate with me, most often, they cannot tell that I am perhaps 3-4 years their junior (that is if I don't act goofy or silly). They always assume that I am one of them as I have no trouble talking with them or understanding/sympathizing with many of the things they go through. This is definitely a cultural difference that has been rather startling of a revelation for me. I always thought it ridiculous to say that 4 years is a generation gap (I commonly think of it as 10), but when people in China have such giant gaps in maturity level, I can see why this saying has come about in such a gigantic population. There really isn't a need to associate with people your senior or junior, because there are plenty of people within your class to be friends with who are at the same level and on par with you. It is definitely an interesting dilemma, one of which I am not too sure I am fond of.
Kamla's Birthday + 元宵节
Good things come in small packages, or so I am told. In today's case, good things can come in a short amount of time, so I truly enjoyed the reprieve from work, though I must say that I am completely exhausted.
The previous night, we had a lot of fun at the 南京大牌档, which was loads of fun. Since it's 元宵节 today, it is the 15th day of Chinese New Year's, and it marks the "end" of the lunar new year celebrations. As a result, yesterday, there was a bunch of cultural art stands, that sold their artwork at reasonable prices (10 rmb a piece). I think this is one of my favorite aspects of China, is the little stands that contain so much culture. It's fun for me just to browse, and the street foods are always amazing. They had this lovely sugar candy that is heated up into a syrup, which they can "draw" into lovely designs/zodiac animals. I got a butterfly, and watched in amazement as the artisan poured the syrup into a skilled design, which cooled almost instantly. He slapped a stick on it, and I happily frolicked around, nibbling at the thing looking like I was 4 again with a giant lollipop in my hands. It was priceless. I was browsing at their artwork, and found one of the art styles that I've seen before back in Guilin when I was traveling 2 summers ago. It is where they have a glass vase, but paint on the inside of it instead of the outside, a reverse art that takes years of training to master the skill. I found trinkets that were much too large and impractical, but then noticed the tiny little cellphone devices they had for sale. I decided to pick the 兰花, which stands for purity in the midst of "dirtiness." Since practically speaking, I hate things that jingle on my phone, I ended up purchasing one for my sister and wrote her Chinese name on the inside (a free feature). Luckily, she was willing to write it in traditional Chinese, and I found this a much more meaningful gift than any of the other things I saw on the entire street.
Today though, after some morning errands, Kamla and I had a nice lunch at a Korean restaurant, where the sam kye tang was unfortunately not as good as Korea's (and had a lot of 鸡精 in it... MSG), but it was still good to share a nice meal outside. We traveled home on our bikes, and I chatted with my parents on Skype for a bit. It was nice to catch up and I showed them the grand chop I made as I shortened my hair by probably 6 inches. I think it's a good, fresh start for my hair to start growing back again. My hair is currently undamaged and back to its original state. I am personally relieved. This evening, we celebrated Kamla's birthday with her 50 公 and her 阿姨, and since her uncle typically cooks everything, we thought it'd be nice to show them some of our personal skills for once. I made 3 dishes, but the chicken wings didn't come out as nicely as I would've liked, nor did the mushrooms as they began to get too soggy. Argh! Darn my lack of skills, but it was good. We had cake, and far too much food (more leftovers in the fridge to last us a week or two again... *sigh* hate that). But yes, at least we celebrated in style. After our food bit, we went downstairs and lit up another bout of fireworks in celebration. Since today is 元宵节, it marks the final day that we can let off fireworks (legally), and so we let off a good number into the night sky. Currently it sounds like a war zone, as people all let off the rest of all the fireworks they can, so it's just resonating this booming sound incessantly. Oh well, it'll be nice to finally get a good night's rest of peace and quiet after this is over.
The previous night, we had a lot of fun at the 南京大牌档, which was loads of fun. Since it's 元宵节 today, it is the 15th day of Chinese New Year's, and it marks the "end" of the lunar new year celebrations. As a result, yesterday, there was a bunch of cultural art stands, that sold their artwork at reasonable prices (10 rmb a piece). I think this is one of my favorite aspects of China, is the little stands that contain so much culture. It's fun for me just to browse, and the street foods are always amazing. They had this lovely sugar candy that is heated up into a syrup, which they can "draw" into lovely designs/zodiac animals. I got a butterfly, and watched in amazement as the artisan poured the syrup into a skilled design, which cooled almost instantly. He slapped a stick on it, and I happily frolicked around, nibbling at the thing looking like I was 4 again with a giant lollipop in my hands. It was priceless. I was browsing at their artwork, and found one of the art styles that I've seen before back in Guilin when I was traveling 2 summers ago. It is where they have a glass vase, but paint on the inside of it instead of the outside, a reverse art that takes years of training to master the skill. I found trinkets that were much too large and impractical, but then noticed the tiny little cellphone devices they had for sale. I decided to pick the 兰花, which stands for purity in the midst of "dirtiness." Since practically speaking, I hate things that jingle on my phone, I ended up purchasing one for my sister and wrote her Chinese name on the inside (a free feature). Luckily, she was willing to write it in traditional Chinese, and I found this a much more meaningful gift than any of the other things I saw on the entire street.
Today though, after some morning errands, Kamla and I had a nice lunch at a Korean restaurant, where the sam kye tang was unfortunately not as good as Korea's (and had a lot of 鸡精 in it... MSG), but it was still good to share a nice meal outside. We traveled home on our bikes, and I chatted with my parents on Skype for a bit. It was nice to catch up and I showed them the grand chop I made as I shortened my hair by probably 6 inches. I think it's a good, fresh start for my hair to start growing back again. My hair is currently undamaged and back to its original state. I am personally relieved. This evening, we celebrated Kamla's birthday with her 50 公 and her 阿姨, and since her uncle typically cooks everything, we thought it'd be nice to show them some of our personal skills for once. I made 3 dishes, but the chicken wings didn't come out as nicely as I would've liked, nor did the mushrooms as they began to get too soggy. Argh! Darn my lack of skills, but it was good. We had cake, and far too much food (more leftovers in the fridge to last us a week or two again... *sigh* hate that). But yes, at least we celebrated in style. After our food bit, we went downstairs and lit up another bout of fireworks in celebration. Since today is 元宵节, it marks the final day that we can let off fireworks (legally), and so we let off a good number into the night sky. Currently it sounds like a war zone, as people all let off the rest of all the fireworks they can, so it's just resonating this booming sound incessantly. Oh well, it'll be nice to finally get a good night's rest of peace and quiet after this is over.
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